Wait For Me
by Arise Sir Knight
Summary: While living in Liverpool, Merlin meets Gawaine and through him, someone who finds him very interesting.
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1 : A NEW FRIENDSHIP**

Gawaine was in trouble from the time he got up until he retired at night. Everything he did just seemed to turn out badly and he was always blamed and would never have thought to have lied and tried to pass them off as someone else's actions. He figured that he was just unlucky like the time the football he was kicking had hit the corner of the wall and bounced out of sight into the staff parking area.

He heard a stifled shout of indignation and went to see what had happened. His ball had rolled beneath a teacher's car but not before bouncing off the bonnet of the Head's car leaving a few muddy scratches and a slight indentation.

The whole incident witnessed by the Assistant Head, resulted in the man saying, "I might well have know that you would be involved somehow!" as he walked back into the school followed by his son Maurice who had given Gawaine a snobbish eyes-raised-to-heaven look. His father had told him to be careful in choosing his friends and although he had never mentioned anyone by name, the boy knew that he was referring to one Gawaine the son of Lord Michael and Lady Grace Knells of Hexforth Hall.

Gawaine attended a good school in Liverpool, St. Edwards. His father had gone there when it was a boys' only establishment but now it was co-ed. Everyone on the staff knew that Gawaine had brains but it was just unfortunate that he never put them to any use scholastically. He coasted along just managing to slip by each year. In class he was the last one to be named as a partner and the better students held their collective breaths that their name would not be matched with his. As a result, most of his projects were his own work.

One day at half term a new pupil arrived in the school, word preceded him that he was a scholarship pupil and the snobs in attendance looked down on him. Whereas most new pupils seemed to wear a sign across their chests saying, 'I'd like to be your friend!' this boy had no interest in other students and if anything, his sign would have read, "I don't need friends."

He was happy sitting alone with a book at lunch. He was not really interested in sports but if during gym he was chosen to participate on a team, he did so willingly and proved his worth. However, his lack of interest in pursuing friendships meant that he was usually on the sidelines watching and without any apparent desire to join in.

Class was a different matter, he was bright and well-read. The teachers knew he could be counted upon to answer clearly and that his depth of knowledge had yet to be challenged by the subjects he was taking.

As many of his classes were odd numbered, he was on a few occasions paired up with Gawaine who had no partner. This caused him no hardship as he secretly admired the other boy's independence and originality.

Gawaine was excellent at sports and had to admire the new boy's stay-with-it-attitude even in Track and Field especially cross-country. Gawaine was not the fastest runner but he was solid and determined and usually placed high in the ratings as other boys flashed by burning themselves out before the course was completed. He was therefore surprised when his partner in English, stuck to his heels from the beginning to the end of the course.

Slowly the friendship between Gawaine and the new boy became solid. Gawaine was no longer a loose wheel, he had a reason to be sensible. His so called friends were less impressed. He'd given them many opportunities to laugh at the staff's expense but now he'd changed. He didn't want to be the leader in pranks which would probably go wrong and he'd end up taking the full brunt of the punishment.

Not surprisingly as he continued with his project partner, his marks started to improve. He began answering in class surprising not only himself but his teachers.

-0-0-

One day, a nasty character made fun of the new boy insinuating that he was at the school only because he'd received a scholarship and even his uniform was second hand.

The words were only out of his mouth before he felt someone's weight against him. He crumpled to the ground and within seconds a hall monitor arrived with a staff member. Gawaine was hauled off the boy and escorted to the Head's office.

Gawaine listened silently to the Head. He refused to explain his actions and was told that as he couldn't follow the rules, the school secretary would be notifying his parents that he was coming home early. He would see him with his father on Monday.

Monday came and Gawaine went to class as his father met with the Head. "He's been doing so well. His conduct has improved and then he loses it over some boy's disparaging remarks about one of the new boys." He looked at Gawaine's father and added, "He is a clever boy and should do well. Maybe once he matures, he will have a different outlook on life."

Gawaine's father nodded, his wife and he had seen the change in their son's attitude to school. It was as if he had seen the open net and was determined to score.

When asked by his mother, he would only say that his days of playing the silly beggar were over. He wanted to do well and get a chance to attend a good college. Gawaine's father had been pleasantly surprised as he'd never heard his son talk about his academic future. Whatever was responsible for this change of heart, he didn't know...

He found out one day when Gawaine asked his mother if he could have a friend join them for tea as they needed to work on a project for science class.

Merlin entered their lives. They both liked him immediately, he was intelligent but when he smiled his face lit up with a love of life itself.

He had explained to them that he and his mother were new to the area. He had arrived after the Christmas break and found the boys less than welcoming to a new scholarship student. He explained that he lived with his mother and great uncle and that the chance for a place in the school where his father had studied had come out of the blue. His mother and great uncle were thrilled and managed to purchase a second hand uniform and off he went to a new school leaving all his friends behind.

He'd smiled saying that he was teamed up with Gawaine in some of his classes and realised that he was no slouch, just misguided as to where his efforts should be focused.

Gawaine had laughed as Merlin was so diplomatic. Gawaine's father nodded and his mother was charmed by her son's new friend.

For the next few years, the family got to know Merlin well. Gawaine's mother had talked to Merlin's about allowing her son to join them for two weeks during their holidays.

"Only, if you don't think he will be a nuisance,"Hunith had said.

"We are used to boys. I never had a daughter but Gawaine has an older brother in university and younger brothers who are twins. It will be fun for him to have a friend of his own age. He's been the best thing in Gawaine's life for the past two terms and academically he is really doing well and I attribute that to Merlin's presence and…" she added laughing, "…I even think that the Head is missing his frequent visits to his office. Don't worry, we'll look after him like he's one of our own. His father told me that the two of them were researching Arthurian legends last time they were here and surprisingly that is not on their curriculum."

"If you are sure, he will be no trouble, I would like to accept your kind offer and hopefully later in the holidays you might allow Gawaine to join us here."

-0-0-

Merlin packed his bag and took the bus to Gawaine's house. The family's Land Rover was in the drive and he added his bag to the others already piled beside it. Besides the usual car which Gawaine's mother used there was a rather nice white Porsche.

Gawaine came down the stairs when he heard Merlin talking to his father, "Laurence says that we can go with him if we want. The twins wanted to but he said that his car was not for children." Merlin looked at the Porsche with eyes wide open.

Gawaine laughed saying, "No, not that one, that belongs to a friend of Laurence's from Uni. He's off to Paris for the week with his father and he dropped by to leave his car here. Says it's cheaper and safer than the parking at the airport."

Merlin nodded he still had much to learn about the lives of the rich and famous. Then he felt guilty as if he were lumping all people with money into one often unfortunate group. They had a car in their family too but it was his uncle's ancient Vauxhall. It still ran and got them from point A to B but without any pretensions of grandeur.

Gawaine pointed to a VW Golf, "That's Laurence's car. He says it's easy to park and cheap to run but I think my first car will be a big SUV. He says I could have a Tiguan but as I have no money and no license, I think that will have to wait. How about you?"

Laughing Merlin realised that Gawaine would hardly be impressed with his choice of favourite car, a Mini Cooper S. He liked them and seeing them on the road made him feel happy. His mother used to tease him but although he changed his choice of colours over the years, he knew he still wanted a Mini.

All the luggage was loaded into the Land Rover and the twins and their parents left. Merlin had not yet met Laurence and he hoped that he was like Gawaine and that he would feel comfortable with him.

Laurence came down the stairs with his friend who drove the Porsche into one of the empty garages. He threw the keys at Laurence and said, "If you have to take it out, make sure that it is full of petrol when I get back."

Melin thought that that was very generous of the Laurence's friend but when he mentioned so later to Gawaine, Gawaine had laughed saying that unless the situation was one of dire need such as one of the twins being on the verge of death, Laurence wasn't likely to touch the car." He laughed adding, "He knows how much it costs!"

"Is his friend rich?"

"Yes, very! They seem to have houses and flats everywhere and when he graduates he will just go into the family business. No tramping the streets looking for a job like most people."

Merlin was impressed, that sounded rather nice, no need to worry about tuition and a guaranteed job once you graduated. He knew that he had to work hard to keep his marks up and win a scholarship into university.

They got into the back of the car as Laurence was driving his friend to the airport. The two of them spoke quietly in the front and Merlin felt that it was a bit rude as they hadn't even acknowledged the two of them sitting in the back but then he figured, that was what big brothers were like.

However, once they dropped off the friend, Laurence invited him to sit in the front. Gawaine nodded that he should. After a couple of miles, he realised that Laurence was quite normal, funny and very like Gawaine. He decided that it was the other passenger in the car who had been the problem.

-0-0-

Gawaine's family house in Cheshire was big and welcoming. It had been in the family for years and had that lived in look. Regular meals were eaten in an area off the kitchen except Gawaine told him on holidays or when they had guests. Then the meal was served in the proper dining room.

Upstairs was a maze of rooms including all the bedrooms and Gawaine even had his own bathroom because Laurence had moved upstairs onto the next floor. The twins shared what Gawaine referred to as the old school room. It was huge giving both of them lots of space. They were friendly kids, Kieren and Garth and at eleven years old would be starting St. Edwards in September.

Merlin thought that at least they would have each other and an older brother in the school. He remembered how lonely school had been those first few weeks until he had hooked up with Gawaine.

The two weeks seemed to fly by. They'd gone hiking, spent days in the sun around the pool, tried to play tennis and even spent an hour pony-treking from a local stable. They had visited Gawaine's friends by bike and had felt free in the country.

Gawaine's mother had taken them to visit the historical Quarry-Bank mill in Styal and following a visit to Buxton, Gawaine's father had taken them all for lunch to the second highest pub in the UK, the Cat and Fiddle in the Peaks district. Gawaine was impressed and had announced that one day it might be his home away from home.

Laurence had laughed saying, "Don't be silly after one drink you would probably be under the table!"

"I wouldn't be as I know that one day, I'll be known to my friends as a renowned drinker."

His father had laughed saying,"That is not exactly what your mother and I have in mind for you as an adult."

"Well, I'd have a job and make a lot of money but me and my friends would visit all the pubs and get drunk like Laurence and his friends do."

Laurence decided that that was a far as he wanted to go in that conversation but the twins said that beer tasted awful and everyone laughed as the conversation turned to the Cable Car which they were going to ride the following afternoon at the Heights of Abraham.

It was soon time for Merlin to leave as the family was going to spend some time in Ireland with Gawaine's paternal grandparents. They drove back to Liverpool as the family would be going by ferry via the Isle of Mann. Laurence wasn't going and had offered to drive Merlin back home. He had told Gawaine's mother that he had money to take the bus but she had insisted that he should be delivered to his door.

His bag packed into the Golf, he stood and watched the others leave for Ireland. Laurence was nice to him and chatted to him on the way home telling him about his friends at Oxford and how if Merlin intended to go to uni himself he should consider the same school.

Laurence waited until Merlin's mother had opened the door and then he waved and drove off. Hunith was impressed by the young man's thoughtfulness but Merlin assured her that it was Gawaine's mother who had insisted that he should wait until he was sure there was someone at home before driving away.

"Did you have a nice holiday? Your Uncle Gaius is in so come and tell us about it."

Merlin started at the very beginning and was able not only to tell them about his holidays at Gawaine's but also to show them his photos on his iPhone. Both adults were impressed and Hunith said that he would have to send a little thank you note to Gawaine's mother for the lovely holiday.

Merlin went to bed that night dreaming of cable cars, ponies and an old mill where if he had been alive in the seventeen-nineties, he would oprobably have been working in deplorable conditions.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2 : LIVERPOOL CALLING**

On the Spring Bank holiday, Gawaine and Merlin were at loose ends, they'd spent the weekend at Merlin's and had finished their English project. Gaius and Hunith had decided to drive across the water into New Brighton, not particularly wanting to drag after them along the prom and have tea at some little cafe, Merlin had suggested that instead, Gawaine and he should start on their next project which was history and had to do with the founding of Liverpool.

Hunith warning the two of them not to get into any trouble, got into the car with Gaius and left as Gawaine said, "Where in heaven's name did you come up with that? I thought it was to be about the North West not Liverpool specifically."

"I just thought that we could spend a day wandering around Liverpool by ourselves."

Gawaine's eyes lit up, "Have you ever gone up the tower in Liverpool Cathedral?" Merlin shook his head so Gawaine continued, "That's what we'll do first. We've got our students cards so we should get a break on admission." They took a bus and were soon walking down from central Liverpool to the docks.

Liverpool Cathedral was huge, Britain's largest cathedral and world's largest Anglican Church. Merlin recognised its outline but he had never been inside.

There were other visitors but finally they got inside. Merlin was shocked, the interior of the church was set up for a huge banquet. All the chairs and kneelers had been removed and in their place were poshly decorated tables. They were later to find out that renting out the space helped defray the yearly expenses.

Merlin still found that the cathedral was wonderful and spent most of his time with his head tilted back looking at the stained glass windows and the organ. He also picked up a couple of pamphlets about the cathedral.

Gawaine was behaving himself even speaking in hushed tones. He said, "I like this traditional cathedral better than ours which is so modern."

"Do you know how much it would cost to build a church like this nowadays? My Mum told me that that is why the Catholic Metroplitan Cathedral's building plans had to be changed to make it smaller and modern."

"Yes but…" Gawaine said, "St. Edward's provides the choir for our Cathedral and that's better."

"Why?" asked Merlin.

"Because it is…" Gawaine was staunchly proud of his school's choir. Not that he belonged to it as no choir master needed to deal with the likes of Gawaine. Merlin laughed, he too was proud of the fact that some of the boys in their classes were choristers and had even been on TV when Masses were broadcast.

They made their way around the church to the tower and had to wait until they could get onto the lifts. Merlin noticed the condition of the tower. It was built from 1904 to 1978 and he noticed sections that were out-of-bounds. The ascent of two lift rides took you up and then you had to climb one hundred and eight stairs. Gawaine asked if they were safe and the security guard assured him it was as long as he followed the rules.

Merlin wanted to laugh as that was one of Gawaine's weak points. He decided he would keep an eye on him just in case he decided to show off. He didn't want his name to appear in the newspaper if Gawaine got hurt, for one thing his mother would be furious with him. He needn't have worried as Gawaine behaved himself.

Once up there, they had fabulous views of the area. They could even make out Blackpool Tower standing on the horizon around thirty miles to the north. "My Gran now lives near Blackpool." Gawaine said. "Miles of yellow sand…you can run until you drop and never reach the end."

Merlin liked the top of the fretwork on the balustrade around the tower with little stone finials on the top reminded him of a castle. He felt that he could reach out and touch the Cunard Building with its statues that were on the Liverpool Football Club Logo. To the south around eight miles away, they could make out the black castle like towers of the Runcorn Railway Bridge. To the south east the white modern structure of their Metropolitan Cathedral only half a mile way and to the West the Pennines, the hills of Wales. It was a clear day and using the information leaflets they were able to pick out all the places.

Merlin was impressed as was Gawaine who decided that one day they would go to the top of the Radio City Tower as well. "Will we have to climb stairs?" Merlin wanted to know.

They made their way downstairs and left the cathedral turning to the left to go through the tunnel to visit St. James Cemetery which was a stone quarry in 1825 and is below ground level in the shadow of the cathedral. Burials stopped being held there in 1936.

Merlin said, "It's like a sunken garden a bit spooky as it has been a cemetery."

They passed heads stones stacked against a wall. There were also catacombs in the East wall. Many of the walls were damp looking and covered in green moss. People has also chiseled the names of the deceased into the walls with dates from the 1700's. Merlin shivered and pulled his jacket tighter around him.

Gawaine decided to tell a story and they sat on a bench.

Gawaine started, "My grandma was a florist's apprentice and one of her jobs was to line the open grave with greenery and flowers before the funeral." He looked at Merlin's face to see that he was both impressed and horrified. "The plain earth walls of the grave were covered as the casket was lowered on ropes and straps held by the gravediggers."

"Do they do that now?" Merlin wanted to know.

Gawaine who had attended his grandfather's burial, shrugged his shoulders saying, "I guess the rich might but at Ford they used a carpet of fake grass to cover the sides and a machine to lower the coffin down into the hole and it wasn't done until we had left but Laurence said that in some places the family stands and watches the coffin going into the ground."

Merlin decided that he'd prefer to leave the coffin on top of the grave but then thought that it was more final if he stayed and saw the coffin into the grave. He said, "Guess things have changed over the years but keep going about your Gran."

"Because most of the funerals were in the morning," Gawaine continued, "my Gran said that the girls had to be there early leaving the shop on Bold Street just after six.

"If the florist's van was available they would pack the chicken wire, anchors and hammers into the van, with the evergreen branches and if the client wanted also the flowers, they would even weave flowers into the boughs of evergreen.

"My grandmother said that it was cold and damp because the cemetery was below street level," he pointed up and to his right and Merlin could see the tour buses above them on the road. "She also said that she had to wear gloves as the evergreen needles pricked her fingers and wellingtons as often the grave had water in the bottom of it. The worst time was in the winter in heavy rain, especially if they had to stand around waiting for the custodian to let them in.

"If the van was busy, they had to take the tram when all the people were going to work and they had rolls of wire, evergreen boughs and tools.

"Bet they were popular, Merlin!" Gawaine said sarcastically. "Can you see a bus driver today allowing them on with all that stuff during rush hour. Luckily they were able to borrow the gravediggers' ladders."

Merlin nodded as he couldn't see a tram driver allowing someone on with a ladder. He again felt a shiver run up his spine, "How much did it cost to have a grave lined?"

"All my Gran said was that they were burials for rich people. The florist where she worked was vey posh, she had a picture and all the sales ladies in the front of the shop wore black dresses and had a pair of scissors hanging from their belts.

"When they finally got into the cemetery, they went to the grave to line the whole thing with the chicken wire and attach it with hooks. My Gran said that the youngest apprentice usually went down into the grave. She used to laugh telling us about one time, she was in the grave and another apprentice lost control of the hammer and it fell into the grave but luckily missed her."

Merlin smiled and said, "They could have had a double burial!"

"Hey! That's my Gran your talking about."

Gawaine was soon striding across the grass towards a wall. He stopped and looked up, "See those stones that jut out, they make sort of a stairway up to the street."

Merlin stared at the wall, he couldn't see any staircase but Gawaine was already walking diagonally across the wall from stone to stone and finally Merlin saw what he meant. There were blocks of masonry which stuck out and he guessed they could be considered as steps.

Gawaine reached the top and disappeared over the wall presumably to land on the pavement. He then appeared again sitting on the wall looking down at, "Come on, it's your turn now. Make like a mountain goat!"

Merlin laughed and started up the wall, it was easier than he had expected as the stones were really like steps. He was more than halfway up when he heard a yell, "Oi! Git orf the wall, this ain't no bleeding playground!" He froze!

"Keep climbing!" He heard Gawaine say from above. He regretted ever starting up the wall but there was no way he was going to try to turn around and go down to the irate security guard. He had flashes of his mother's face as he was dropped off at home by the police for inappropriate behaviour on church property.

Even though he could still here the shouts from below he concentrated on Gawaine's voice and kept climbing. Finally, he felt Gawaine's hand on his wrist as he manhandled him over the top of the wall to land on the pavement where they collapsed laughing.

"My Mum must never know about this she'd have a heart attack."

"No trouble," Gawaine said with a grin, "As I can tell my Gran and she would help me line her grave with flowers."

Merlin grinned standing up to announce that he was hungry.

He later asked Gawaine if his Gran still talked about the graves. He'd shrugged saying that she didn't remember things very well anymore and she lived with his aunt in Lytham-St. Anne's and if they talked about graves all she would say was that it was cold work and she would rub her hands together.

He nodded, before she had died his grandmother who had lived with his great Uncle Gaius, used to tell marvellous stories about the Banshee and the Kelpies but she too had begun to forget things and it was his Mam who now told the stories. He had liked her and it was after her death that Gaius had moved in with them.

Gawaine was chatting away and then Merlin realised that he was talking about food and he tuned in. They passed a couple of food trucks and one offered real food like fish and chips, while another sold ice-cream. They were hungry and by pooling their money they were both able to get a portion of fish and chips and a drink. They sat on the wall and ate their lunch.

"Let's walk down to Albert Dock, there are always lots of girls there…" Gawaine said with a twinkle in his eye. Gawaine was careful when he was at school, he tried to stay away from the girls as it invariably got him into trouble. As his father had told him that he would have plenty of time to have female company when he had finished school. Therefore, he steering well away from them only nodding and saying hello to the sisters of the boys he knew.

Merlin smiled as he thought, 'Poor Gawaine, he wasn't the problem. It was the girls who were always after him and he often ended up as the scapegoat if there was a lot of fooling going on. He had to give him credit though as he just used to accept the criticism and lectures from the teachers with no hard feelings.'

He laughed as he had once heard a teacher say that it would be good for Gawaine to stand up for himself and declare that he had not been involved but who would believe him, he'd heard the other staff member had said.

One good thing was that many of his teachers were becoming to realise that Gawaine had finally found his strengths and was a good student after years of loafing around and doing nothing in class.

One day, the English teacher in Lower Six mentioned that Gawaine should start looking into further education as he had the brains and the motivation. The class clown had spluttered out, "Who, Sir, Gawaine?" hoping to get a laugh out of the class and the teacher had quickly turned on him saying, "Don't worry, Doyle, I won't be saying the same to you any time soon!" Looking at his hands, the boy couldn't face his friends who were now grinning at his expense.

Merlin had never had a girlfriend. He liked girls as people but he didn't see himself partnering off with one in the near future. He had a lot of things, he planned to do first.

Gawaine interrupted his thought as he said, "Wow! Look at her."

He turned to see a very nice looking woman crossing the road with a man. He said, "Gawaine, she's old enough to be your mother!"

"Maybe…but you have to agree she has a great figure is beautifully dressed and would look good on my arm at the next school dance. Anyway, I'm going to go to Albert Dock and get my Gran something nice in one of the gift shops. My Dad gave me a fiver as we are going to visit her next weekend. You should come too…maybe we could get her to talk about the graves again."

"Very kind of you to invite me but if it is a family visit, I wouldn't fit in."

"Sure you would, my Mum says that you are a hero as you finally managed to get me on the right track, something which no teacher over eleven years of schooling had ever been able to do!"

Merlin grinned, little did Gawaine know but he had saved him from being ostracised as a new boy in his first year at St. Edwards. He loved the school and got on well with most of his classmates and he had Gawaine's outgoing personality to thank for that.

Merlin thought that Gawaine's gift of a model of the Anglican Cathedral was an excellent choice of gift for his Gran.

As they took the bus back to Merlin's where his father would pick him up later on, Gawaine said, "We should do this again. I had fun and there are so many other places to visit in our fine city which by the way has the best football team in the world."

Merlin laughed ducking out of Gawaine's reach as he said, "Everton?"


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3 : LOWER SIXTH**

As it had been such a success, Gawaine and Merlin planned to do another day on their own in town. It would have to wait for one of the midterms but they could have fun planning what they intended to do.

School was due to start again in September and feeling very proud they spoke about finally getting the black blazers which Gawaine had admired for years. Getting rid of his purple blazer and putting on the black one of a Lower Sixth student, he was sure would start a new chapter in his life.

Merlin more conscious of money worried at the added expense of another blazer. He was however pleasantly surprised in August to receive a letter from the School Alumnae naming him as the recipient of the Founders' Scholarship in recognition for his exam results, providing him with free tuition, uniform and the expenses of all school trips taken care of. He knew there was an Italian trip scheduled so he could now quite happily get excited and talk about it with the other students.

Hunith worked hard so that was a burden taken from her shoulders. She had worried how Merlin would cope with the change of school but seeing his glowing results she realised that she needn't have worried as obviously he had managed well and his studies had not suffered. She felt some of this was partly due to Gawaine who had made the transition into a new school easier.

She'd laughed as one evening when he was visiting and having his tea, they had been talking about the future. Merlin was not adding much to the conversation but Gawaine was in his element. He told them Gaius and her that he intended to get married once he was out of university and had a job and then he intended to have four sons.

Hunith had said, "Four? That will be quite a handful!"

"Well, maybe but if my wife's parents could help us put a downpayment on a house we might be able to do it."

"And do these nebulous boys have names?" Merlin wanted to know egging him on.

He grinned at Merlin's mum and said seriously, "Matthew, Mark, Luke and John."

"Thank goodness, I thought you might have wanted to call them, "Earth, Air, Fire and Water."

"You know, Merlin, I hadn't thought of that I might just take it under consideration."

Gaius laughed, he could see that Gawaine was good for Merlin as he was more serious whereas Gawaine was more lighthearted. He wondered if in Merlin's case, it were because he was the only child of a single mother.

"Anyway, enough about me, Merlin, what are you going to call the fruit of your loins?"

Merlin blushed as his mother laughed at Gawaine. He just shrugged as in the depths of his being he knew he would never have any children.

"Well, I think you should consider, Peregrine, Kestrel, Faulkner or even Gawaine. Did you know that on some baby names' lists my name means battle hawk? Well, that's what my Gran told me."

Hunith said laughing, "Gawaine, do you not think that your future wife might like a say in naming these children."

"No, that would be arranged before the wedding that I was going to be in charge of the names of the boys and my lovely wife might choose the girls' name but on second thought I do like the names Filly and Puppy!"

Merlin rolled up his serviette and lobbed it across the table, Gawaine caught it effortlessly.

Hunith said, "O.K. off you go, to whatever you were planning to do."

While Gawaine turned to her as he followed Merlin out of the room and said with a grin, "Nothing too energetic'

She heard Merlin say, "Planning for school…

Hunith shook her head smiling at Gaius as she cleared the table and did the dishes. His father would have loved him. Her mind flashed back to the little three year old at the military funeral but she stopped herself. Going over it all again was painful and wouldn't bring her husband back…

-0-0-

In Lower Sixth, the time went quickly, the classes were smaller and the teachers continued to push them. Gawaine and Merlin were not always partners in projects but they still continued to challenge each other academically. Merlin had expanded his friend pool and was well known on the sidelines during football practise. The boys laughingly threatened to adopt him as the team mascot. He loved football and although he was hopeless at it even with Gawaine's coaching, he enjoyed the game and had decided when he had some extra cash he might even go to Anfield to watch Liverpool play.

He knew that as a treat in Sixth Form the school team went to tour either Anfield or Everton's Goodison Park. Gawaine had told him that there were usually extra tickets and he would put his name in for one if he wanted. Merlin had agreed immediately but only for Anfield.

-0-0-

One day, Gawaine didn't come to school and Merlin worrying that he was sick phoned his house. He only spoke to the housekeeper who explained that Gawaine's grandmother wasvery sick and the family had gone north to be with her.

That evening Gawaine called Merlin's phone. As he wasn't in, his mother seeing Gawaine's name and knowing what Merlin had said about his grandmother picked up telling Gawaine Merlin wasn't home. Hunith could tell by the muffled voice that something was not going well. He told her that the hospital had phoned to tell them that his Gran had taken a turn for the worse and his parents had gone back to Blackpool.

Hunith said, "Are you there alone?"

"No, the twins are in bed and Mrs. Rolf is staying over. Could you ask Merlin to phone when he gets back?"

"I don't expect him until after nine o'clock, he's out with Gaius..."

There was silence from Gawaine and Hunith said, "He didn't take his phone with him. I can phone Gaius and if he even has his turned on, he can let you talk to Merlin." There was still silence. "I'm hanging up now and will try to get Merlin." She heard a muffled thank-you and Gawaine hung up.

Knowing that they were at a film and Gaius probably wouldn't have his phone on, Hunith was surprised to hear Merlin's voice. "Mom, is everything all right?"

"Yes, was the film awful?"

"Not great, so we left early."

"You left your phone on the sideboard and knowing about Gawaine's Gran, I answered it. He is home but his parents had to hurry back to Blackpool as they'd heard from the hospital that his gran has taken a turn for the worse.

"I promised you would phone him. Merlin if you want to go to see him, you have my permission. Tell Gaius to pull over, as I want to speak to him."

Merlin handed Gaius back his phone and sat thinking of the cemetery below Liverpool Cathedral. He wondered if he would ever get the chance to meet the lady who lined the graves with flowers.

"Do you want me to drive you over to Gawaine's? Gaius asked.

Merlin had a flashback to when his Gran died and how he had wished that he had had a friend with him, so he said, "Yes, please!"

-0-0-

Mrs. Rolf opened the door and said, "He's in the kitchen, go through."

Gawaine stood when he saw his visitor and said to Mrs. Rolf, "I'll be in my bedroom."

He neither acknowledged or said anything to Merlin who just followed him in silence.

Sitting on the bed, he said, "I couldn't sit up here on my own. It was strange as if in allowing myself to think, I would be affecting the outcome."

Merlin sat beside him and said, "Thinking about what might happen can't hurt your Gran. I remember sitting beside my Gran's bed and asking God to take her away from all her pain. Looking back now, I realise that I knew that the time had come and in a funny way, it was all right"

"But no one in our family has ever died…I mean…not someone I know. What will happen?"

Merlin remembered feeling completely lost when his grandmother had died. His mother who he relied on, was having a really hard time in those first few days and it was Gaius who had taken over running their little household. His cooking left a lot to be desired but he could make scrambled eggs and corned beef hash. He'd told Merlin that after the war it had been a staple and that he should be thankful for it and not turn his nose up at it.

He told Gawaine about the telephone call in the middle of the night to say that she had died. He surprised himself by sobbing and hanging onto his mother not wanting her to ever leave him. The next day, Gaius and she had gone off to the funeral director to make arrangements. The following day, the coffin was brought to their house for the wake and it sat in the living room. Their parish priest whom he had seen at the hospital came to say prayers and later his Mum's closest friends arrived and they said the rosary.

"It wasn't bad at that time, as it was as if she were still there with us and neighbours kept dropping off food. No more corned beef hash," he said with a sad smile. "Then, I think two days later, the hearse came, the coffin was carried out and we went off to church for the funeral Mass and the burial. It was a spectacular day and we could see right across the Mersey. I also remember a fire engine passing us on the way to Ford Cemetery."

He paused before continuing, "After Mass, Gran's coffin was carried to the grave and Fr. McDermott said more prayers and then we went to the local pub where there was a special reception. I think coming home to the empty house was sad but by then my Mum was feeling better and…well, we just sort of carried on."

"If anything bad happens will you come to the funeral?'

"Yes," said Merlin, "if my Mum gives me permission."

-0-0-

…and permission he did receive as Mrs. Mulvany was buried overlooking the sea on a bright Saturday morning following a requiem Mass at Our Lady Star of the Sea Parish in Lytham. Gaius and Hunith also attended the funeral. Merlin remembered the priest's words of committal from his Gran's funeral, _'We commit this body to the ground, earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust.'_

Gawaine made his way to Merlin's family after the graveside prayers and said quietly, "There were no flowers in her grave…" Merlin understood immediately and feeling sad, put his arms around Gawaine and hugged him.

As they were driving past the white Lytham Windmill, his mother asked him what Gawaine had meant and he told her about the young lady called Marie who had lined the graves in St. James' Cemetery in the shadow of Liverpool Cathedral.

-0-0-

School passed quickly, there were days of fun but also many days of serious work Lower Sixth was an important year. Gawaine and his family went away over Easter and Merlin and his mother upon Gaius's urging spent a couple of days in Belfast. It was a real holiday as they took the ferry from Liverpool. It was his first serious boat ride and apart from feeling slightly seasick at one point when the weather was rough, he enjoyed the eight hour trip.

He laughed as his mother weathered the storm with no complaints. She'd said to him, "Don't feel bad, many times I've been so sick I never made it out of the toilets. Your grandfather used to say that you'd be less likely to be sick if you stayed on deck," she'd laughed, "mind you, when the boat's pitching like a cork and the rain is driving, I think I'd rather be dry and seasick than drowned like a rat."

They had stayed over the weekend with distant cousins, the weather was marvellous and a trip to the Giants' Causeway fascinated him. He decided that when they were older, he and Gawaine would repeat the same trip.

He did…but not with Gawaine.

-0-0-

After the Easter Holidays, they had half term at the end of May. Neither boy was going away so Gawaine had suggested that they continue their tour of Liverpool.

Gawaine phoned him, "The weather is supposed to be intermittently cloudy with a possibility of rain..."

Merlin laughed saying, "Why would it want to rain on half term?"

"Well, rain has never stopped us before unless we have a record breaking flood. Just think school might be closed."

"Not a good idea as we still have exams and they might make us go to school all summer."

"Not me! My Dad wouldn't let me go as I need my holidays to remain sound in mind and body."

"Well, I want to get my exams over with, then I can relax during the summer."

"Merlin, do you ever relax?"

"Yes...well sometimes I do...honestly I do. Not like you who would quite happily laze in bed half the day."

"I do not laze, I am lying there thinking deeply."

Merlin gave him the 'yeah right' look then added, "Can I choose where we go this time?"

"It had better be good as my time is precious and I probably could do with a little reviewing."

Merlin rang off laughing. The place he wanted to go was on the river, he'd driven by with Gaius who had promised that one day they would come back...they hadn't yet. He'd looked it up on the internet and decided he'd like to spend more time there. If the weather was good, he might talk his mother into making them sandwiches.

The day dawned bright with little white clouds scudding across the sky.

"Wrap up warmly!" His Mum had said as he put his camera, the sandwiches and two bottles of water in his backpack, "…and don't do anything foolhardy. You're precious, you know!"

Merlin walked back and gave her a hug. Listening to some of the stories from the kids at school he realised that his Mum was one in a million. Little did he realise that the same could have been said about him…


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4 : ANOTHER PLACE**

Merlin kept all the information which he had gained from the internet to himself, he wanted Gawaine to see it first before talking about the whys and wherefores. They had taken a bus around seven miles north of the town to an area near Blundell Sands on the Mersey to a beach called Crosby beach.

The beach was two and a half miles long and dotted across two miles were one hundred lifelike self sculptures by Antony Gormley. Some were up on the sand, others stood in the shallows while others were closer to the Mersey. Most were submerged by the tides.

Merlin was interested to learn that Crosby Beach was not their first home as they had been exhibited in Germany, Norway and Belgium. The figures were to be have been moved on to New York but because of their popularity they had remained where they now stood.

They got off the bus and walked down to the beach as far as the eye could see there were iron sculptures of the men. Most were barnacle encrusted by their frequent dippings in the Mersey high tides.

Gawaine said, "I've seen pictures of them but I hadn't realised how big they are."

It was fascinating to see all the figures silently looking out to the Irish Sea. Merlin explained that the work was called Another Place. "Do you know the Angel of the North?" Gawaine nodded. "Well, that is also by Gormley." He glanced around and then added, "They're wonderful aren't they."

"Well, you would never feel alone on this beach as they are always here. Are you going to take any photos?"

Merlin handed him his backpack and removed his camera, "If it's all right with you, I'll just wander around and see what I can get."

They separated and Gawaine walked around a few of the figures which stood six foot plus. He could see Merlin in the distance lining up a shot and thought that it would be interesting to fly a drone down the beach and photograph all the figures. Not just the top of their heads but fly lower, and circle each sculpture, say at waist height. He wondered if the locals had given any of them names. He tried to count them all but it was too difficult as some of them were so far away these just looked like black poles and he kept losing count.

Standing there alone, he suddenly realised that Merlin was a speck in the distance and he had the horrible feeling that the figures were warning him of something they could see on the horizon which was going to cause trouble. He tried to shake the feeling off but it persisted. He thought that maybe on a day when the beach was crowded with people he wouldn't feel that way, he almost peed himself when something nuzzled into his knee.

He jumped as a voice said, "Ringo, leave him alone!" and he glanced down to see a Dalmatian frantically wagging his tail and offering him a red ball. He breathed a sigh of relief and suddenly the figures once again became sentinels not heralds of doom.

The dog owner looked at the nearest figure and turned to say, "Good thing you came early as later on this place will be crowded with all the visitors. Do you live nearby?" Gawaine nodded and said that he lived in Liverpool. "Out by yourself then, we don't offer see lads your age admiring the sculptures on their own. Are you an art student?"

Gawaine shook his head and pointed to a figure coming towards them over the sands, "No, I'm with my friend, we try to visit different places on our mid-terms"

"Well, if you want something else to visit, you might try the Liverpool Overhead Railway Museum. Come on Ringo Old Man, you're not getting any exercise. Give me the ball!" The dog did and the man hurled it down the beach and the dog bounded off after it."

Gawaine watched the man follow the dog. It was strange as he felt that he knew him. Obviously, the sculptures were getting to him. In the distance, he could see the dog circling Merlin as he had stopped to talk to its owner. Merlin seemed to speed up as he reached him.

"Did you see him?"

"Who?"

"The man with the dog?"

"Yes, he was right here, why?"

"You didn't recognise him!"

"No, why?"

"It was the sculptor Gormley. I recognised him and said 'Hello!' and told him how much I enjoyed his art work. He said that he likes to try to visit the beach once in a while and see how _his men_ are doing!"

Gawaine smiled stupidly, that was why the fellow looked familiar he had been studying his replicas for at least an hour.

"He asked me how my photos were coming along and he said that if I sent him a copy of one and remind him when and where we had met, he would autograph it for me. Wait till I tell Gaius!"

The sun which had been bravely battling the clouds gave up, a cool wind picked up and they knew that their time on the beach was over. 'Talk about telling Gaius,' Gawaine thought wait until he told his father. He also decided that if they could manage to get Crosby Beach into one of their projects Merlin probably had great photos and maybe even one with Antony Gormley.

They wandered back to the promenade and found a little area where they could eat their sandwiches and Merlin could show him his photos. Gawaine decided that he was cold and passed on the water deciding he wanted something hot to drink. They went to the cafe in the Community Centre opposite the beach. Merlin's eyes lit up he had enough money from his week's pocket money to buy a hot chocolate. It was warm in the cafe and Gawaine splurged on a lemon slice which they shared.

Gawaine then started chatting up the girls on the next table, giving Merlin time to go through his photos. He was not conscious of one girl insisting that Gawaine introduce her to his handsome friend but Merlin was miles away and all he did was smile and nod. Girls weren't his thing.

They finally got on the bus after Gawaine had exchanged phone numbers with al least three of the girls. Merlin just shook his head and kept his phone in his pocket.

"You could have acted more friendly," Gawaine complained. "One of them couldn't take her eyes off you the whole time we were there."

"I was friendly, I smiled and nodded."

Gawaine just laughed and punched him in the shoulder. He'd liked girls since he realised they were different from boys. He'd never had a real girlfriend but he was never left on the sidelines if he was at a party or any co-ed gathering. His brother Laurence had an on/off girlfriend and had told him to wait to become serious until he was at university as there were some great girls there. He laughed as he figured in two years he'd be ready.

Merlin looked at him, "What's so funny?"

"Nothing really just thinking about my future and all those fabulous girls I'll be meeting at uni."

Merlin shook his head and grinned back at him. His mind told him that he would not be following that path.

-0-0-

Gawaine's father confided in his mother that their middle son must have been paying attention the last time he'd had a man to man chat with him about his schooling and his chances for a place in a good university. Gawaine's mother smiled to herself as she was sure that his friend Merlin had more to do with Gawaine's attitude than his father's conversation. She thanked her lucky stars the day Merlin had walked into her son's life and anchored it.

Things had been so peaceful since then. No more messages to contact the teachers about their son's lackadaisical attitude towards his education and the school rules. They were thrilled with his report card and happy when he got back on the football team and seemed more interested in what went on in school and more importantly he seemed happy just being Gawaine.

Exams were looming on the horizon and both boys were applying themselves to their studies. They both expected to do well and to go to Upper Sixth next year. However, it would depend upon their marks as neither wanted to hang around to resit their exams hoping for higher marks.

Merlin during the course of the year had found the Theatrical Arts Group and Photography Club and was enjoying their activities while Gawaine had reapplied to the football team and he had been accepted on trial until he could prove that he had changed his behaviour and would be willing to attend each and every practice not just turn up at games, dressed and ready to play.

-0-0-

Once the two of them were sitting in the kitchen at Merlin's when he had asked, "What was the most embarrassing day of your life?"

Merlin had answered in kind, "Let me see the most embarrassing…" He couldn't tell Gawaine the truth as he held that secret from even his mother. So, he just said, "I don't know, you go first."

Gawaine had launched into a series of events, most of which shocked Merlin, "But what made you decide to change, you're not like that now?" he'd asked.

Gawaine grinned and said, "You became my partner and suddenly subjects made sense and I saw that I could do them and it wasn't that hard." He glanced at Merlin and said, "…and my time was more occupied and I had less time to play the fool."

"Bet the teachers were relieved!"

Shrugging Gawaine said, "Guess so…but some of things we did were truly funny," he became serious then added, "well, they seemed to be at the time."

"Yes, but which one was the most embarrassing thing which ever happened?" Merlin prompted him.

"Well, it was the last match of the regular season two years ago against Seaforth Junior and I was gung-ho. Lance who was captain and I changed with the others and then Coach came in and gave us a pep talk and then announced that I would not be playing the away game as my behaviour was not representative of the school spirit. They left me sitting in the changing rooms and got on the bus and I heard it drive away."

Merlin could imagine the shock and hurt. He wondered why the Coach hadn't found a way to tell him prior to getting changed instead of doing it in front of the whole team?"

Gawaine explained how he had sat there in tears and when he got home and told his parents, his mother was on his side but his father said that the Coach had been in the right and maybe it was a hard lesson to learn but something good might come of it.

"How old were you?"

"Must have been the year before you arrived at St. Edward's maybe, thirteen or fourteen. Looking back, I was a real baby and could hardly face the other players the following day in school. I knew they were all looking at me and feeling sorry especially as they had won the match and were going onto the quarter finals.

"My mother said that to show I was growing up, I should attend the matches as a spectator and behave myself as maybe the Coach would see that I was serious. It was hard as I so wanted to be on the pitch. After the last match of the season, the Coach walked by me but I dropped my head as I was ashamed, he stopped in front of me and said my name, I stood up and he said, 'It's a hard lesson to learn and next season if you have proved that you can respect school rules and regulations I might reconsider my ban.' I could have hugged him but I knew that wouldn't have gone over well!"

Merlin had laughed, trust Gawaine to see the funny side to it.

-0-0-

Merlin lay in bed that night thinking of their conversation. He knew that Gawaine would have been shocked if he had told him about what had happened to him. He had been maybe seven and was with his mother shipping in M&S. He'd been bored and decided to go to the john which was on the second floor and he'd left after telling her where he was going. It was down a corridor near the clothes area. The place seemed empty and he was going to sing as he loved the echo that you got from large toilets.

Then he had been conscious of sounds and the shuffling of feet and figuring that someone was in one of the cubicles had kept quiet. He could feel the hairs of the back of his neck rising as he listened to the noises and the subdued guttural voices.

His Mum had told him that carers sometimes had to go into the handicapped cubicle with their clients so he had dismissed it as just that. He had washed his hands and had put them under the drier when he felt an arm around his neck and someone's hand down his pants.

A deeper voice called out, "Don't be stupid, Man, leave him alone!" The arm around his neck loosened and he looked into the mirror to see the backs of two men leaving and he noted that there was no wheelchair. He was plunged onto darkness as one of them had turned off the light switch. He hadn't even been able to scream!

He was petrified that one had left and the other man who had touched him was still in the washroom. Suddenly, the door opened and an older voice said, "Kids! Why can't they just leave the lights on instead of fooling around?"

It had been a man in uniform whom he took to be a policeman and he'd said, "You all right, kid? Did your friends leave you in the dark?"

Merlin remembered he'd muttered something and left at a run. The man had called after him but he had already been halfway down the hallway running into the main part of the store. He'd found his mother who'd asked him if he was all right as he looked flushed, he'd lied and said that that it was because he'd run all the way back to her.

As the years passed, he grew to understand what had happened but even now he was never comfortable in a public toilet in a strange area. His motto used to be 'Go quick 'n get out'.

He lay in bed his heart racing and tried to once again answer the question, "Why?"

 **The cover art for this story is one of the Gormley figures from Crosby Beach, Merseyside UK**


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5 : A MISDIRECTED PUNCH**

Merlin left school around two as he had a dental appointment. He didn't hear from Gawaine so he phoned him after supper. He was surprised that his phone was answered by his father who told him that his son had lost phone privileges. Merlin figured that it might have had something to do with using his phone at meal times. He knew that rule existed there as well as at his own home. His mother referred to it as respect for the people sitting at the table.

Merlin arrived in school early to get an update from his science partner on what he had missed the previous day.

"So, how about Gawaine then?" Stephen said, "That was quite a fight."

Merlin looked at him blankly, "What!"

"Gawaine's fight with Lance. They were really going at it after football practice. Coach threw them both off the team. He was furious as when he tried to stop the fight, Gawaine hit him." Seeing the look of disbelief on Merlin's face, he added, "It's true, ask the others, we were all there."

Merlin packed up his books to leave, saying, "I'll get your notes later. I have to find Gawaine..."

"They'll probably be suspended, both of them as they wouldn't stop for the Coach. Don't expect to see them in class as they'll be with the Head and their parents all morning."

Merlin realised that he had never really seen the old Gawaine in action. He'd heard rumours of what he had been like in the earlier years but never anything about serious fighting. What had started it? Lance was a good chap, an excellent player. He had no idea what would have set Gawaine off but from what Stephen had said, it seemed that Gawaine was the instigator.

Their first class was English Lit and there was an audible buzz in the room even when Mr. Chorley called for silence. He was a young teacher well respected by the staff and liked by his students. Knowing that he was not going to get their attention and that it was their first class of the day, he decided to let them get it out of their system. He insisted that only members of the football team who were at practice could talk, explaining to the class that anything else was to be considered as hearsay.

Merlin was horrified as the story evolved. It seems that Gawaine for no apparent reason had let into Lance and left him with a bloodied nose.

"Gawaine didn't come away empty handed as he had a bruise on his face," said Mick.

"So did The Head!" one student said happily.

"Johnson, as you are not a member of the football team, you are only repeating hearsay."

"But it's true, Sir," added one of the players, "he tried to separate them and Gawaine's fist made contact with his head." He turned to the rest of his teammates and asked, "Didn't it?" A few of them nodded.

"I heard that Gawaine had a knife," someone added.

"Hearsay!" Merlin heard another player say.

"Will the Head press charges with the police?"

"That Matthews will depend entirely upon the head and what exactly happened. I do not believe that Gawaine intentionally punched the Coach."

"He might have, Sir, as I remember when Gawaine was thrown off the team what was it three years ago?" He looked around to the others to see if they remembered.

Mr. Chorley said, "I wasn't here then so I cannot comment on your statement"

Looking back, Merlin saw that Mr. Chorley had retained control of the class while allowing them to have their say, finally everyone settled down and the lesson continued. It seemed that what Stephen had told him had been more or less the truth.

Neither Gawaine nor Lance were in school for the remainder of the week.

-0-0-

Finally, Merlin was able to reach Gawaine as he was home alone and he'd phoned the landline.

He'd told his mother what had happened and tried again the cell phone but it was still turned off. "Could I drop by to see him, do you think?"

His mother shook her head, "Better to phone first..."

"What if his father picks up? Should I hang up immediately?"

Hunith shook her head, "No, that would be rude. You could ask to speak to his mother, even if she won't let you talk to him, she might mention to him that you phoned."

Mid-afternoon, Merlin had a free period and he used a friend's phone to call Gawaine's house. It surprised him when Gawaine answered.

"Can you talk right now?"

"Merlin? Where are you phoning from? I don't recognise the number."

"I'm using Leon's phone. Are you all right?"

"Yes, of course, bored out of my skull," he sighed, "I've even been studying!"

Merlin laughed, "I was worried you'd be shipped to Siberia. When are you coming back to school?"

"Probably Monday…does everyone know about it?"

"What do you think?" Merlin said with a hint of laughter in his voice. "The team is saying very little and it's mostly the gossipers who are enjoying it as nothing else has happened to interest them. Can you come to my place over the weekend? I have some notes for you and also info on an upcoming practice test in history." He heard Gawaine sigh so he added, "We can review stuff too, that would make your parents happy."

"Look, I doubt that they will let me out of here but they might let you come over to study," he chuckled, "or something like that..."

Merlin laughed, "Good to hear that you still have your sense of humour!"

"Do you think your mother will let you visit me or am I a _persona non gratis_ in her eyes?"

"No, she thinks you're a wild child anyway; however she said that I should phone your house to see if someone would let me talk to you. Who's there at the moment?" Merlin asked.

"No one! The twins are on a school trip and my mother went to help as a chaperone and my father is at the office. I was warned not to leave the place under penalty of death...and Mrs. Rolf will soon be here to start supper. I'll ask Mum if I can have you over and I know that my Dad has a conference over the weekend so she might be able to convince him that as I've been so-oh good that I deserve a day of studying with you! Got to go, Mrs. Rolf's car has arrived. I'll get back to you."

Merlin was laughing as he hung up. If anyone could convince his mother, Gawaine hopefully could.

Nonetheless, it wasn't Gawaine who phoned but his mother. She had quite a long chat with Hunith to which Merlin was not privileged. She hung up and said, "Well, you have received permission to spend Saturday at Gawaine's so don't let me down as I vouched that you would bring him up to date on work he'd missed."

"Thank-you, thank-you, thank-you!" Merlin hugged her and waltzed her around the kitchen.

A voice suddenly said, "...and why wasn't I invited to this event."

Hunith laughed as she greeted her uncle and brought him up to date on the situation.

Gaius knew that Merlin had been missing his friend so he nodded, "Don't let Gawaine talk you into doing something other than reviewing as he has to convince his parents that he's a reformed character."

Merlin broke out laughing, "As if that will ever happen!" He knew his mum and Gaius were laughing as well.

Friday, he told his Mum that he knew Gawaine's locker combination so after classes, he would pick up some notebooks that might be important. He has not heard from him since their phone call but at least he's see him tomorrow. He was not intending to push for details but he would like to know what had instigated the fight.

-0-0-

Saturday dawned bright and the day promised to be sunny and warm. Midmorning, he took the bus to Gawaine's. There was only one car in the drive so he knew that his father must have already left. One of the twins answered the door and suddenly became shy because after all Merlin was a Lower Sixth pupil.

Gawaine came down the stairs smiling, "Good you came!"

Leaving his back pack in the hallway, they walked into the kitchen. Mrs. Knell was having a sit down and she motioned the boys to join her at the table. "Your father had to be convinced that it would be a good idea for Merlin to come over. I do not want to see that I made a mistake in suggesting it. Lunch will be served at one o'clock. You will work in the little sitting room so I can keep and eye on you!"

Gawaine laughed and hugged his mother, "I promise we shall work, right Merlin?" Merlin nodded.

And work they did, the twins didn't disturb them and Merlin managed to bring Gawaine up to date on what he had missed. He finally said with a grin, "Maybe we should have invited Lance to join us for this tutorial session." A frown crossed Gawaine's face and Merlin knew that he had touched a raw nerve.

Gawaine's mother came in to find out if toasted ploughman sandwiches sounded god for lunch. They were right in the middle of math session and Gawaine asked if they could have another fifteen minutes to get it straightened out. She left the room smiling, they had really been working hard, she'd get the twins fed and out of the way so the two of them could eat alone.

As they sat down, Merlin was blown away by the sandwiches not only was the cheese extra sharp cheddar but it was served with a choice of homemade chutney or HP sauce and even a half a boiled egg and some pickles on the side.

His eyes must have lit up as Mrs. Knell said, "You both worked hard and need a nutritious meal. Tea for both of you?"

"You should come for lunch more often as I am usually thrown a dry roll and some pemican," Gawaine said laughing.

Once lunch was over they only had history and English to work on. The afternoon flew by and Merlin got up to stretch. "I've been sitting in one position for so long that my bum has gone asleep!"

Mrs. Knell came in and said, "I have spoken to your mother, Merlin, and she says that you can stay for supper and Gaius will pick you up when you are ready to go hime."

"Mr. Knell won't mind if I am here for supper?"

"I told him you were invited to stay and he won't be home until tomorrow."

"Could he stay over?" Gawaine suggested.

"No, I think that might be pushing your luck. As you have been in all day, I now want you to take the dogs to the park." She paused at the door and said, "…and don't lose either of them."

Merlin liked Gawaine's dogs, the Lakeland Rambler had sat in the armchair with them in the sitting room all day and he had heard the Old English Brigadier or Brig as he was more commonly know playing with the twins in the garden. The boys had been playing football and Merlin realised that he and Gawaine had not spoken at all about what had happened after the school practice.

-0-0-

Merlin took Rambler and Gawaine Brig, they decided to do the circuit in the park at a run pacing it to Rambler's speed. For a little terrier he certainly could cover the ground and afterwards they took a break on one of the benches close to the park gates. Rambler had climbed on Merlin's lap so that like a typical terrier he could have a good view of what was going on nearby.

Out of the blue, Gawaine had said, "You know, I didn't start the fight. Lance made an insinuation and I told him to take it back and he refused and then the conversation got heated and he pushed me and instead of just pushing back, I punched him. Then bedlam broke out and the others gathered around, I really don't remember much until the Head hollered my name. It was over very quickly and I think if it had only been Coach Lewis he would have made us shake hands and kept us on the bench for the next game but as the Head happened to have seen the while thing and become involved, it became a major offence."

"Did you know that you had hit the coach?"

"No, I was trying to get at Lance and he must have got in the way of my punch." He smiled sadly and added, "Not the brightest thing to do to get between two people when they are fighting. I know it was a stupid thing to do and on school property at that."

"How long are you suspended?"

"Until Monday afternoon as we have to meet with the Head and Coach Lewis in the morning. I also had to write an apology to Lance's parents and I know he wrote one to mine as my mother commented on the fact that she had always known that he was a well brought up boy."

They lapsed into silence. Gawaine didn't offer to tell Merlin what the fight had been about and Merlin didn't feel that this moment was the right time, maybe in a few weeks but not now.

-0-0-

Over the next few weeks they sat practice exams and obviously the majority of them did well as the teachers seemed happy and their marks were good.

Life settled down and reviewing was the flavour of the week. Wherever you went Lower and Upper Sixers seemed to have their noses in their books.

After the final exam there was much rejoicing and school was out for another year. Results would be mailed and Merlin hoped for nothing less than B+'s but preferably A's.

One of the Lower Sixth parents' had opened their house for a party. There was much excitement as there was to be a live band and if you had a girlfriend from another school she was also invited to attend. Merlin knew the house and he realised as he was given a wrist band that there would be security on duty to keep out non-invited guests.

Gawaine was full of himself, he'd become friends with one of the girls they had met across from Crosby Beach and he'd invited her to attend and she'd offered to get a girl for Merlin.

Merlin had refused laughing saying that there were plenty of girls in their own class that he could hang around with if he wanted. Gawaine had shrugged, "Suit yourself! Some of the girls in our level are not half bad and most of them have the hots for you anyway."

That had surprised Merlin as he had never noticed, yes he got on well with all the girls and they often sat around talking but he'd never thought of what that would seem like to an outsider. He shrugged, he supposed that he was just a person who liked people.

Knowing that one day he would have to explain things in more detail to Gawaine, he decided that before the summer was out he was going to come clean.


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER SIX : RESULTS WILL ARRIVE BY POST**

Driving home that evening with Gaius, Merlin remembered a conversation he had had as possibly an eight year old with Gaius. He remembered asking Gaius, "Will I ever have a girlfriend?"

"Would you like a girlfriend?"

"I don't know but the big kids in school said that unless you have a girlfriend you can't be a man. When I grow up, I want to be a man, not a little boy!"

"Don't worry, Merlin, boys grown up to become men so when you grow up you will be a man. If I were a betting man, I would say an intelligent, kind and understanding man..." he smiled as he added,"...and good looking like your father."

"And will I then have a girlfriend or only friends who are boys?"

"That will be up to you, if you think it would be good to have a girlfriend, then you will find a girlfriend however; if you would like a boyfriend then you could have a boyfriend."

"...like Max's Father? He has a boyfriend who lives with them. Max says that he plays a saxophone in a band and Max's father plays a bass. I'd like to play a bass but they said that I would need a half sized one."

Gaius smiled to himself Merlin's mind was sometimes like a grasshopper, refreshing but very grasshopper-ish! "So, why don't you join the school band?"

Grinning from ear to ear, Merlin said, "...because the only instrument left was the tuba and it was almost as big as me!" Then he became serious again and asked, "Why do some men like men?"

"Because they like being with other men."

Merlin suddenly had a flashback to the men in the M&S toilet. He suddenly felt uncomfortable and said, "I don't want to talk about that anymore. Let's talk about the doctor in your lab who raises snakes."

Gaius was surprised at the sudden change of topic but they continued talking about snakes, until Merlin said, "I think I'd like to have a snake. If my Mum won't let me have it in my room, you could keep it for me in your room as you're not afraid of snakes are you, Gaius?"

Thankfully, they had reached the school and Gaius said, "We'll talk about this later. Do you have your lunch money?"

Merlin patted his pocket and happily ran into the playground.

When Gaius saw Hunith later that afternoon, he told her about the tuba and the snake making her laugh, then he mentioned Merlin's interest in Max's family.

Hunith nodded, "He told me that Max's having two father's wasn't fair as he didn't have even one. We then talked about Ron and the other pilots and we looked at photos before he went to bed. Next morning at breakfast, he says out of the blue, 'You don't have to worry, Mum, as I have decided to have Gaius as my grandfather. Do you think he will say yes?' I'm sure he will as after all, he loves you very much and he is already your great uncle! Then he was off on another tangent as he said, 'Good! Can we have fish and chips for supper?' Honestly, he never fails to amuse me..."

"I'm going to have to keep my wits about me as he grows up," Gaius said laughing. "Anyway, I told him that when he grows up he will be a man! Probably very intelligent, kind, understanding and..." he smiled at Hunith as he added, "...and very handsome, just like Ron."

-0-0-

...and keeping Gaius on his toes he did! One day as a fourteen year old, Gaius was driving them to pick up Hunith who had gone to the shops, Merlin said out of the blue surprising even himself, "Gaius, do you know anyone who is gay?"

Gaius looked over at him momentarily and nodded, "Yes, some of my co-workers are, why?"

"Don't know...do they seem different from the other scientists?

"Not really, just like everyone else, sometimes happy, sometimes bored, hard working, the life of the party or shy and retiring. Not everyone wants to shout their sexuality from the rooftops, some people prefer to keep it to themselves. Someone once said to me that I would be surprised at how many people I know who are gay."

Silence reigned again before Merlin asked, "Do parents go off their kids when they tell them they're gay?"

Gaius shook his head as he said, "Some may be a little surprised and worried that their lives will be difficult but they still love them. Mothers, grandfathers and great-uncles will always love their children as they are still their little boys but all grown up. Why?"

There was absolute silence except for the engine on Gaius's car climbing Upper Duke Street near the Cathedral. Merlin finally broke the silence by saying, "Would Mum and you still love me?"

Gaius twigged and said, "Merlin I will love and support you until I die. You are such an important part of my life. Of course, I will love you as all I would want is for you to be happy."

"Good!' A little voice said before adding, "Gaius, don't tell Mum yet, as she will only worry but I think I might be gay!"

-0-0-

Knowing Hunith better than even Merlin did, Gaius never came out and told her exactly what Merlin had said. The next time that Merlin was out, he'd just smiled at her and said, "Merlin and I had another one of those heart-to-hearts in the car."

Hunith said, "Was he all right or was he upset?" Gaius then realised that his niece was way more intuitive than he was and in a way was relieved that she was not too surprised. She smiled as said, "Gaius, he's my son, I had a feeling that he was questioning his future." Her eye filled with tears as she said, "I just can't help worry about him because I love him so much and couldn't bear to see him hurt."

Gaius wrapped his arms around her and said, "Don't worry, we'll keep an eye out for him, he'll always have us to turn to…"

-0-0-

St. Edward's Sixth Class final results for Lower Sixth were mailed to the students' homes. Merlin raced in with his envelope and tore it open at the kitchen table, his face broke out into a huge grin. He had done it all his marks were A's and A+'s. He danced around the kitchen and as he had promised phoned first his mother at work leaving a message for her and then Gaius.

Gaius was almost as excited as he was, the results were so important for Merlin's future. He insisted that they went out to celebrate so once he was free, he picked up his great-nephew and they drove to Merlin's choice Wagamama in Liverpool One and told him that he could have anything he wanted on the menu.

"A beer?" Merlin asked.

"Anything on the menu which is not alcoholic," Gaius insisted and Merlin had laughed at him.

When she got home late that evening, Hunith was thrilled that the two of them had gone out to celebrate. She promised that on Sunday after church they would have a family meal and if he wanted he could invite a friend adding, "Have you heard from Gawaine?"

"Couldn't get him, but he worked really hard so unless he goofed up his exams, he should also have the marks to get into Upper Sixth. I can't believe it that I made it to Upper Sixth!"

-0-0-

Gawaine phoned later that night. "Got your message great results! However, you won't be the only one going up as I passed too! My father is more thrilled than I am, if that is possible."

"This is great! You and I can continue studying together, you get another year with Coach Lewis and if this year's theatrical production goes as planned it will be great. Your Mum must be so happy too."

"I told my mother that the letter had arrived and we were both too scared to open it. Once I got up the courage and saw my marks, you would have laughed as we danced around the kitchen. She said that by the time she got the twins to that level she will be grey-haired from all the worry."

Merlin laughed, his mother had also said that his stress had communicated itself to her and she was relieved that the results were out. "Can you come for dinner on Sunday? My Mum wants to have a special meal."

"Sorry, I can't make it. May I have a rain check as we're going off to Belgium? Staying with a business partner of Dad's whom he's known for years. My mother isn't fussy on him says he's always got to have the last word. Mrs Rolf is looking after the twins so it will just be the three of us. Laurence used to go with them but he's not available so they'll have to put up with Yours Truly."

"Well, once you return, "Merlin said laughing, "we'll plan to have supper at my house to celebrate our results. Now tell me, how did you do in each subject?"

They compared their marks and Gawaine was blown away with Merlin's marks. "You must have topped the class! How did McInerny do?"

"I don't know, he's stronger than me in History."

Gawaine laughed as he said, "Well, your A+'s are nothing to be sneered at. Is he planning to return next year?" Even though Gawaine couldn't see him, Merlin shrugged his shoulders.

He could hear Gawaine's mother in the background, ask if he was packed. Gawaine said, "Merlin, I have to go. I'll phone you tomorrow. Bye!

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"" Merlin said as he disconnected.

Gawaine laughed as Merlin's advice would limit him from doing anything interesting. He tried hard to get him interested in going out on Friday's but to no avail. Merlin was a homebody, socialising at school but seldom going out at night except to a film he specifically wanted to see. Gawaine wished he would go out with his teammates, he knew they would be happy to have him along but after Merlin had heard what they sometimes had got up to, he'd shook his head.

He also wanted to find Merlin a girl to hang around with at parties. He'd go to parties and leave early always going home by himself. It was frustrating as so many girls liked him but if they suggested to Merlin to go out together, he'd blush slightly and then become shy and shake his head. Gawaine wasn't even sure that he had ever kissed a girl.

-0-0-

He put the few last things in his suitcase including a couple of good shirts and his black shoes, hung his good suit on a hanger as directed by his mother. He knew that they would be eating formally at night. He'd really be just as happy to stay at home but his Father had told him that he was expected to go with them.

They left early the following morning hoping to beat the traffic to Manchester to get a direct flight of one hour to Bruxelles. They had laughed about it as a flight from Liverpool to Brussels could take up to seven hours with all the connecting flights. Gawaine's father said one flight even left Liverpool to go west to the Isle of Man before flying back east to Brussels.

The flight was non-eventful and they landed safely being met at the airport by a chauffeured limousine and whisked out of Bruxelles Charleroi airport for Ixelles.

Laurence had told him about the house but he was taken with it as soon as he saw it. It was on a square and reached by a flight of shallow steps and had large casement windows on both the ground and the first floor. On the ground floor there was a stone balustrade and a wrought iron balcony across the first. I was built in a beige/apricot brick with lots of fine stone carvings. His father was later to say that it had cost his business partner over $4 million, and that certainly did not include the furnishings and the refurbishing of the swimming pool in the basement. Gawaine just wanted to laugh and had wished so much that Merlin had been with him as his eyes would have popped out of his head.

The business partner supposedly also had a country estate in Wales and a house on Mulberry Square in London. Their host was not home when they arrived and they were told by a member of the staff who introduced himself as Pierce that dinner would be served at seven o'clock but that a chauffeur was at their disposal if they wished to be driven back into Bruxelles so that the young gentleman might do some sightseeing.

They were shown to their suite of rooms which included two ensuite bedrooms separated by a private sitting room. Gawaine laughed as he said that he would be too scared to sit on the satin brocade furniture in case it either broke or he spilled something on it. His mother told him not to be silly.

Gawaine and his father took advantage of the chauffeur to drive around Bruxelles. It had been enjoyable as the driver called Roland was a much better tour guide than any bus guide might have been. Although their sightseeing on the first day was short, Gawaine did manage to get shots on his iPhone of the Atomium with its nine huge balls representing an iron atom. Merlin would be impressed with that. They drove past cathedrals and museums but Roland told them that they would be better seeing the Grand Place and some other sites on foot.

Pierce met them when they returned and explained, "I think tomorrow you should go back to Bruxelles but the next day, Roland will be driving you to Bruges which I am sure you will all love and also Ghent if time permits."

Gawaine's father commented upon Pierce's excellent English and he had laughed saying that he was bred and born in Surrey, only coming to Bruxelles with his employer as he usually travelled with him. His home was the mews flat behind the house on Mulberry Square, where his wife Sheila was the housekeeper for the Pendragon family.

Gawaine felt that his entertainment for the few days that they would be there was all organised. He certainly wanted the opportunity to taste a Stella Artois maybe seated in a canal side restaurant in Bruges as one of his classmates had recommended.

Soon they were back in Ixelles, they had time to shower and get changed before they went down to dinner. Gawaine was interested in meeting this man who lived on a very different social standing than theirs. His parents were seated in the library having a pre-dinner drinks when a tall distinguished gentleman walked in and greeting Gawaine's mother as his father and he stood.

"Grace and Michael so happy to have you visit me in Bruxelles, I hope that your rooms were to your liking."

His father said, "Uther, they are perfect!" and glancing at Gawaine, he then turned to his host and said, "May I introduce my second son Gawaine."


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER SEVEN : A FRIENDSHIP STRONG AND SURE**

When he returned to Liverpool, Gawaine could hardly wait to tell Merlin about his Belgian holiday. Merlin was mesmerised listening to his account of events which Gawaine could supplement with photos which he had taken.

Gawaine made the three days seem like three weeks. He told of their trip to the beautiful canal town of Bruges and the elaborate churches and the swans. "Houses don't have so much gardens as decks onto the canal. The buildings are so ornate and very tall. You'd love to be there with your camera."

Merlin saw the photos and commented that the Pendragon home looked lovely, more like a five star hotel. He decided two things, one day he would go to Bruges and the other that he wished he could see the beautiful house in Ixelles.

"What was Mr. Pendragon like?" he asked.

"Strange man. He's a genius with business but rather abrupt and doesn't suffer fools gladly, he was quite abrupt with his staff and I heard him yelling at someone on the other end of the phone one morning.

"He was charming with my Mother and gave her a lovely diamond bracelet as a souvenir of her Bruxelles visit. My parents had previously stayed with him in London."

"Does he have any family?"

"He has a son just finishing his second year in the Bruxelles Business School. Don't often see him but there was a portrait of him in the lounge and another in the hallway of him with members of Arsenal taken in London. My Dad told me later that he played football at Rugby."

Merlin smiled at the juxtaposition of the two words. "Is there a Mrs. Pendragon?"

"No, she died when his son was born."

Merlin found that sad. He couldn't imagine how difficult it must have been for the man to raise a newborn by himself. He said so to Gawaine.

"Doubt that he did, the kid probably had a fleet of nursemaids and nannies. It would be strange not having a mother, I always see mine as a buffer between me and Dad especially if I'm in his bad books." He grinned, "However, at the moment we're still on great terms because of my marks. Thanks in a big part to you!"

Merlin said, "Don't sell yourself short, you're quite clever in your own right, maybe not as clever as I am but clever all the same."

Gawaine laughed and said, "Self praise is no recommendation!" And so saying, he gave Merlin a nudge which sent him off the bed onto the floor grabbing for something to hang onto and as the closest thing was Gawaine's leg, he was pulled onto the floor with Merlin underneath him.

They lay there laughing and Gawaine suddenly realised how beautiful Merlin was, one part of him wanted to push him away and the other part wanted to pull him to himself and hug him.

Merlin seemed to come to his senses first and said, "Gawaine, git off, I can't get up until you move your butt."

Gawaine laughed and the moment passed. Nevertheless, when he was alone in bed that night, he remembered his feelings and blushed. He wasn't like that as he liked girls. All sorts of things whipped through his mind but he finally had to acknowledge to himself that he did feel something for Merlin, he shook his head finding that really strange.

Before he fell asleep, he decided the feelings had been because Merlin was a good friend who had encouraged him to change his attitude to school work which had been rewarded with good marks and his father's pleasure.

He smiled as his Dad had even told Mr. Pendragon how he had finally settled down and was going into Upper Sixth. Their host had congratulated him adding, "I wish my son would pull up his socks up and apply himself to his studies. He's a bright boy but too easily distracted from the job of studying by his friends. That's one of the reasons I got this house as I am often here and it's somewhere for Arthur to live off campus. There are a housekeeper and butler here, they see to everything and I think it is helping Arthur settle a bit. Too soon to see any results just yet, but he's got a home base, a tutor three times a week, good food and supervision."

He suddenly laughed as he added, "My man Pierce whom you met is an ex-copper. Just what the doctor ordered but he is only here if I am. I can understand Arthur though as he's a Chip off the Old Block." Mr. Pendragon was obviously proud of his son, whether he'd ever told him, Gawaine didn't know.

-0-0-

Merlin joined Gawaine, his parents and the twins for two weeks in Scarborough, at the hotel of a former business partner. It was on the cliffs overlooking the sea and the weather held the whole time they were there.

Laurence phoned to ask if he could join them as he'd been in Bruxelles with Arthur and thought it would be fun for him to visit the family while they were on holiday. His father had agreed knowing that Uther had probably insisted that Arthur clear it with his father. They were planning to come by ferry from Zeebrugge to Hull so Gawaine's father agreed to send a driver to pick them up as it was less than an hour's drive. The ferry was part of a mini-cruise and they would embark at seven in the evening, arriving around eight the following morning and he knew there would be much partying on board.

"Rob will be meeting you in Hull, so don't turn up drunk!" Gawaine's father warned his eldest son.

The ferry had been late and by the time they had finally arrived at the hotel Merlin, Gawaine and the twins were fooling in the pool. They were diving in then hanging onto the side opposite where they landed, waiting for the next person to dive to see who could dive the farthest. Not the most original thing to do in a pool but they were having fun and the twins were egging them on. They had just climbed out of the pool when Laurence and his friend came around the corner.

As Arthur first saw him, Merlin had just shaken his head to keep the hair out of his eyes and had done a running dive off the side of the pool. Arthur stood stock still, he shook his head the young man was, he told Laurence a sight to behold. Merlin climbed back out of the water and walked over to a table to get a bottle of water and had a long drink.

Arthur couldn't keep his eyes off him and was blown away, "Wow!" he said, "…and he's a friend of your brother."

Laurence said in a low voice, "Keep it in your pants. He's my brother's friend and they're still in school. Anyway, you saw him at our place a couple of years ago. Why the fuss now?"

"He grew up!" was all Arthur could think of saying.

Merlin walked back to the diving board and Arthur decided he was built to swim. He did a forward dive in pike position then back stroked to the edge of the pool so Gawaine could drive. Gawaine's pike was less graceful but the twins applauded it anyway.

Arthur said, "God, he's like a water nymph and I have a rapacious appetite."

Lawrence scowled at Arthur saying quietly, "For heaven's sake, behave yourself!"

Merlin and Gawaine got out of pool as the others approach. Gawaine and the boys were thrilled to see Laurence again. Merlin felt naked as the other man's eyes met his. He grabbed a towel and threw it over his shoulders letting the ends cover his chest.

Merlin was introduced to Arthur, and Gawaine interrupted saying, "So you're an Arsenal fan, I saw your photo when I was in Izelles with my parents."

"Yes, best team in England…and where you there too?" Arthur said to Merlin who for once could think of nothing to say and just shook his head.

Laurence said, "Arthur, let's take our bags upstairs, then see if we can get something to eat as I'm ravenous. Are the parents inside?"

"They're not here," Gawaine said, "as they went off with the owners to see some estate sale to look at furniture, something about a baby grand and a Jacobean sideboard."

"…and went off leaving the two of you alone?" Arthur said including Merlin in the observation. He suddenly huffed as Laurence not so gently stood on his foot and dragged him away.

By the time they next met up it was in his parent's presence, Arthur was his own serious self, no more insinuations and fooling. Laurence was relieved as any bystander listening to the previous conversation might have thought that he was a cad. It was all put on, however Laurence did feel that his friend had deep down been blown away by his brother's friend Merlin.

-0-0-

"Arthur, you're going to frighten the boy if you keep looking at him like that?"

"Like what?"

"Well, as if he is the only person in the room. Please don't embarrass him, honestly he's really a good kid and I would hate for him to refuse to be friends with Gawaine, just because he thinks that I have a weirdo as a friend. He really helps to keep him on the straight and narrow and that keeps my parents happy as well. Anyway what about Hugo?"

"Hugo's nice enough but he never bowled me over like Merlin does."

"Bowled you over enough to get into your bed!" Laurence said uncharacteristically judgemental.

"Hugo and I have an agreement, it is not exclusive and as a matter of fact, he's found someone else."

Laurence wasn't too sure if Hugo was conscious yet of that fact but he just smiled, Arthur was Arthur and he went out with not only young men but also women. People just seemed to throw themselves at him and he wasn't one to refuse an invitation.

Arthur said, "What we need to do is find you a nice respectable girl whom you could introduce to your parents and then marry."

"Where did that come from? I have no intention of being in a serious relationship until I have graduated and decided what I will be doing next."

"Well, I have one more year in Bruxelles and then I am going to do a gap year!"

Laurence laughed, "Arthur, gap years usually happy between Upper Sixth and Uni, why do you need a gap year now?"

"To annoy my father, I'm not ready to settle down in PenD even though he expects me to. Where is Merlin going to university?"

"I don't know, he's Gawaine's friend not mine."

"Is he clever enough for Oxford?"

"According to what my parents say, he is. My father once said that he was not only brilliant but had a wonderful personality and should do well at whatever interests him. If you do or say anything to upset him, you will have the whole family at your heels even Kieran and Garth who idolise him."

Does he belong to a large family?"

"No, just a mother and an elderly gentleman who I think is his great-uncle. "Why?"

"Don't know, just thought I'd ask…" He held his hands in the air as if surrendering and said, "I promise you, Laurence, that I will do nothing to upset Merlin as I have a feeling that one day, we are going to be friends."

Laurence just shook his head and raised his eyes to heaven. He trusted Arthur and knew that he could count on him to behave himself. He smiled to himself thinking, 'Just wait until Mr. Pendragon learned of Arthur's intention to take a gap year.'

Their short holiday was over too soon and Arthur was on his way back to London to spend time with his father. "Please, come and visit over Christmas, Laurence, as my year finishes in December and once I tell Father about my plans I have a feeling that he won't speak to me and I'll be climbing the walls. It's not too far from Oxford to Mulberry Square."

Arthur thanked Laurence's parents for inviting him to join them on holidays. Laurence's father nodded and asked him to give his regards to his father. Laurence drove Arthur to the station in Scarborough and he took the three hour train back to London. Merlin and Gawaine were nowhere in sight.

Merlin watched the two of them get into the car from his room. Over the last two days he had become more comfortable in Arthur's presence. He was no longer upset when he glanced his way and felt that his reaction poolside had been just from the intensity of the man's gaze and his own inexperience. Arthur didn't look gay, he was thoroughly masculine but there had been something between them at first almost as if he could see all of Merlin's insecurities and secrets just by looking at him.

-0-0-

Gawaine came over to stand behind him as the car pulled away. He smiled at Merlin saying, "Arthur is quite something isn't he?" He paused a second and then jumped into the deep end by saying quietly, "He's good-looking and very intelligent and I think he liked you."

Merlin swallowed the wrong way and went into a spasm of coughing. It gave him a chance to get his mind into gear as he realised that Gawaine had twigged about him. He couldn't lie and said after Gawaine had finished thumping him on the back, "He is attractive isn't he?"

"From what Laurence says, girls and boys throw themselves at his feet, he's never without a date and even after they break up they all see to remain friends."

Suddenly in the back of his mind, Merlin experienced a twinge of jealously then regret, 'Why had he to be so much younger than Arthur?' "It was strange in a way, as I felt that I knew him which was impossible as I'd never seen him before."

"But I thought you had already met him at my place…"

"Was he the one with the white Porsche?" Gawaine nodded, and Merlin said, "I guess I was more interested in the car at the time…"

Gawaine laughed, they no longer had secrets between them and Gawaine still loved his best friend.


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER EIGHT : A CHANCE ENCOUNTER**

The Scarborough holiday left Merlin with a clearer mind. He felt as if a huge burden had been lifted from his shoulders. He felt at ease with himself. There was no longer any need to hide his secret from Gawaine as he had smiled at him, he hadn't ostracised him but had just accepted who he was.

Mr Knells dropped off his family first as it was late and then Gawaine and he drove Merlin home. Hunith was at home and came out to thank Michael for bringing Merlin home. "I hope he behaved himself," she said.

"He most certainly did!" said Gawaine's father grinning and ruffling Merlin's hair, "He's a credit to you, Hunith."

Merlin smiled as Gawaine said, "Oh, Dad, he's seventeen not a baby!"

Hunith laughed as she said, "Well, he'll always be my baby!" and Merlin hugged her. not forgetting to again thank Mr. Knells for the seaside holiday.

-0-0-

Summer was already halfway through and the weather turned for the worse. Merlin received a letter notifying him that he had topped his class and had received the Lower Sixth Bursary. A financial payment to reward him for his hard work. It could be used for anything of a scholastic nature. He knew he would put it towards his supplies and possibly the Camera Club's Spring trip to Prague.

His mother took a week's holiday and they went to visit her friends in London. The two of them were on a bus near the British Museum when he saw a white Porsche with a blond driving it, whom he was sure was Arthur. For a second their eyes met and then Arthur smiled and waved. Merlin's felt his heart getting larger in his chest and smiled back. When the bus stopped at the museum and they were walking up the steps, Merlin recognised Arthur's voice as someone called him.

Hunith turned to see a young man, impeccably dressed smiling at her son who obviously knew him. "Mum, this is Arthur, Laurence's friend. He's studying in Bruxelles and we met when we were on holiday in Scarborough."

Arthur said, "I'm pleased to meet you, Mrs. Emrys."

He turned to Merlin and asked, "What are you doing in London?'

"Visiting my mother's friend just for a few days before heading back to Liverpool and school."

"What plans do you have for later this afternoon?"

Merlin looked at his mother who shook her head, nothing was planned they were just sightseeing, so he said, "Nothing really we were going to visit here and then maybe go over to the Globe, I was here on a school trip but Mum has never seen it."

"Might I take you and your son out for supper tonight?" Arthur asked addressing Hunith, "My father is out of town and I really don't want to eat alone." It's only a little white lie he told himself.

Hunith smiled, "I would love to go to dinner with two handsome young men. Where do you suggest?"

"Well, if you like Tibetan and Thai food I would suggest Himalayan Thunder."

Merlin face lit up as both he and his mother liked Thai cuisine and he loved Tibetan momos.

"Then it's a deal, I have a meeting this afternoon but I will see you around six-thirty outside The Globe. We can take the underground from there. Does that fit in with your plans?"

Merlin nodded, he was a little shy and tongue tied as he still couldn't get over that in a city the size of London he had bumped into someone he sort of knew. Wait till Gawaine heard about this!

-0-0-

Merlin said little, he just basked in the pleasure of seeing his mother being entertained by one Arthur Pendragon. He told her about his studies and how he only had four more months to go and then he intended to do a gap year and that he had yet to break that important piece of news to his father who wouldn't approve in the slightest. Arthur had laughed adding, "He can't really disown me for just that, can he?"

He explained to her that he was an only child and that he had never known his mother as she had died the night he was born. Merlin could see the tears pooling in his mother's eyes and she turned to Merlin as she said, "Well, Merlin's father died when he was three and then it was just the two of us. Luckily, Merlin's great uncle lives with us. So I can imagine that your father has had his hands full raising you and if I may say so, Arthur, I think he has done a wonderful job."

The meal was very enjoyable, Arthur chatted with his mother including Merlin in the conversation every now and again. He was so impressed with Arthur's handling of the situation. When he had gone to sit down, he was a little worried that Arthur might just look at him all night and he would have felt uncomfortable and embarrassed but Arthur was the perfect gentleman.

He wondered if indirectly some of the things their host was saying was for his benefit. He told Hunith that he had attended Rugby and then Oxford for a year but his father had felt that the International Business College in Bruxelles would be more of a benefit to him when he took over the company. He had raised his eyes to heaven and said, "Heavens forbid!" causing Hunith to laugh. He told her that he was going to be twenty-one next birthday and intended to celebrate either on top of Mount Everest or at this very restaurant with his closest friends, he'd given Merlin a glance as he had said that.

The evening was over far too quickly. He insisted on taking them home in a taxi right to their friend's door and had escorted Merlin's mother up the steps and formally thanked her for agreeing to allow him to take her to dinner, "…and Merlin as well," he'd added with a laugh.

"I wish that I was going to be here tomorrow as I could have chauffeured you around London to see my favourite places but I'm leaving midmorning on the Eurostar for Bruxelles and the drudgery of school!"

As Merlin passed him to go into the house he said, "Thank you, Arthur, I had a lovely time and you were so kind with my mother."

"Merlin, she is a wonderful lady and I hope to see her again someday…" he started to go down the stairs but wheeled around and added, "…as I do her son. Thank you for agreeing to go out with me."

Merlin gave him a big smile which filled his heart and then full of confidence, said quietly, "Good night, Arthur."

Arthur got back into the cab and grinned all the way home. Whether anything would ever come of their friendship he couldn't hazard a guess but he was more involved in Merlin now than he had been standing by the pool in Scarborough watching him. He smiled to himself today had been fortuitous as his housekeeper would have said.

-0-0-

Merlin was unable to sleep that night, Arthur seemed to commandeer his dreams and he couldn't say that he didn't enjoy it. When he had been sixteen Arthur was already twenty but then he thought that when Arthur was thirty he would be twenty-six and at sixty he would be fifty-six. Why did the difference in ages seem so large when you were young but not worth mentioning when you were older?

Of course, he could be building things up in his mind, maybe Arthur had really just been at a loose end and didn't want to eat alone but he had a funny feeling in his stomach that that had not been the case.

He knew so little about the beginnings of friendship with another man. He needed to find someone he could talk to and not to accept as fact the rubbish on the internet which seemed to have anyone his age being chasing by older men for sex or alternately chasing older men for money.

Deep down he knew that he wanted to be in love with someone and importantly someone he admired and respected. Someone who would challenge him mentally and even maybe have similar interests and certainly someone whom he would not be ashamed to bring home to his mother and Gaius. He smiled to himself…someone like Arthur.

-0-0-

Next morning at breakfast, Merlin explained to his mother how the Knells knew Arthur as Gawaine's father worked as a lawyer for Arthur's father's companies doing exactly what he didn't know. Hunith told her old friend about meeting up with someone Merlin had met through friends and that they had eaten at Himalayan Thunder which was lovely with waitresses in Tibetan costumes, great service and fabulous food.

Her friend was quite impressed, "But how did you ever get reservations they are booked months in advance?"

Hunith and Merlin looked at each other and laughed, they had not even realised that they needed reservations and the Maitre D. had greeting Arthur by name. Wait until Gaius heard about that!

They spent the day with Hunith's friend in London and had lunch at Costas and after a boat trip on the Thames to Greenwich, had supper there at the Café Rouge. The three of them went home tired but happy. The visitors took the Liverpool noon train from Euston the following day with Gertrude promising to come to visit them over Christmas.

As the train left the station Merlin wondered how Arthur was managing in Bruxelles. He realised he must be pretty good in French, probably bilingual.

He could hardly wait to get home to tell Gawaine whom he had met in London and how they had gone out for supper. Then he decided that maybe he would just mention it casually in passing as the chance encounter was something you saw on films or read in novels. He kept saying to himself, it was a one in a million chance that he happened to see the white Porsche and recognised the driver who happened to glance up at him.

In five hours, they were at Lime Street Statin and Gaius was waiting for them in his trusty Vauxhall. They got home refreshed and happy from their three day getaway just in time for a supper of pizza which Gaius had picked-up at a local restaurant. They sat around talking about London as at one time in his life Gaius had worked there.

Hunith told him about supper with Gawaine's brother's friend, "It was just meant to be," Hunith said as Merlin wondered if in a couple of years she would still be as happy. Then, it was time to listen to the Late Night News on TV after which Gaius said that he was ready to turn in.

They went upstairs together each one happy to be sleeping at home in their own beds. "Good Night and God Bless!" Hunith said as she reached her door.

Merlin answered, "God Bless, Mum, and thanks for a lovely holiday!"

Merlin lay in bed looking through his pictures, his favourite shot was the one in the restaurant which the waiter had taken of his Mum, Arthur and him. If he ever managed to get his address, he would email it to him as there was a painting of Mount Everest on the wall behind his head. He turned off his camera and put it carefully on the floor as at least there it couldn't fall off anything. He smiled to himself and fell asleep but not before saying quietly, "God bless Arthur and keep him safe!" He had fallen hard and he knew it…

-0-0-

Merlin was at the Knells for lunch and Gawaine was stunned when Merlin told him about having supper in London with Arthur at a fabulous restaurant which he'd found on the internet to show Gaius and Gawaine. "Gawaine you look as if you have lockjaw...close you mouth!"

"How in hell's name did you convince Arthur to take you out?"

Merlin laughed, "I didn't! He was driving his white car and I was on a bus and at the next stop, he must have followed it because he came up to us. He was a real gentleman, my mother was very impressed."

"Your mum was with you?"

"Of course, did you think I'd go off with Arthur by himself? That would be weird. I wouldn't know what to say to him but if there is someone else there, it's fine. Don't tell Laurence as I don't think he would approve..."

"Approve of what?" came a voice from the doorway. Merlin clammed up leaving Gawaine to fend for himself. "What or who wouldn't I approve of...who were you talking about?" his brother asked.

"Someone at school...!" Gawaine said unconvincingly.

"You're lying, it was more important than that, what was it."

Gawaine looked beseechingly at Merlin and taking a deep breath, Merlin said all in one breath, "Arthur took me out for supper..."

"That sly bastard, I should never have brought him to the hotel and let him meet you."

Gawaine said, "Hold on, Laurence, Merlin's mum was with him. They bumped into Arthur in London and he took them out for supper. Nothing else!"

Laurence was embarrassed, "I'm sorry for what I said about him. He's a very good friend but at the moment...sorry, Merlin, he's way too old and experienced for you."

"But there's nothing going on, he was nice, just like he was in Scarborough," Merlin looked downfallen, "now I'll be afraid to even talk to him. He didn't do anything wrong, actually he spent more time chatting with Mum than he did with me."

Laurence turned to his brother saying, "Gawaine get lost, I want to talk to Merlin alone." Gawaine left not in the best frame of mind, hopefully Merlin would tell him later what his brother had said to him in private.


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER NINE : DECISIONS MADE TO BE ACCEPTED OR REGRETTED**

Laurence told Merlin to sit down. He explained kindly to him that Arthur did find him attractive, "That really doesn't mean anything as Arthur has boyfriends and girlfriends. He's a bit older than you, what are you sixteen?"

"Seventeen!" Merlin murmured feeling that he was letting his side down without a fight, so he added, "I'm old enough."

"Chronologically maybe, but being old enough in years doesn't necessarily mean you're ready for a relationship. I don't think you are ready for Arthur's world yet. From a young age, his father has seen that he was well educated in not only academics but culture and travel. You should plan to stay in school and absorb everything offered to broaden your mind. At your age there is a large gap between sixteen and twenty-one."

"Seventeen and twenty actually…" Merlin reminded him.

"Set your eyes on what you need in your immediate future, your academic goal and good exams results. University should be first on your list and if you are successful maybe Arthur could be second. Believe me, if I am reading Arthur right and if he truly likes you, he'll wait. He's not a man without morals and the reason he left Scarborough was because he didn't want to come across too strong and jeopardise his future chances. In the world of relationships, self control sometimes is of most importance.

"Try to understand me, I'm not saying that in the future when you are in your twenties, you mightn't meet up again and hit it off. However, right now you should concentrate on school and being with people your own age. Does Gawaine know you're gay?"

Merlin nodded, "Can I ask you something? Is Arthur trustworthy? He doesn't want to take advantage of me, does he?" He became embarrassed and dropped his head and closed his eyes, saying, "You know, like…just for having sex."

"The Arthur I know would never force himself on anyone. He's a true gentleman and would never go out of his way to frighten or hurt you. He would follow whatever you wanted to do, whenever you wanted to do it. There would be no need to ever be frightened by him as he is one of the 'good guys'." Merlin smiled and Laurence asked, "Have you ever had a boyfriend?"

Merlin shook his head and a trace of a smile crossed his face and once again looking directly at Laurence said, "No, only friends who happen to be boys."

Laurence over the last few years had met Merlin a couple of times but had never really had a chance to talk to him. The more he spoke with him the more he liked him. He knew he was intelligent as Gawaine had mentioned that he had topped his class two years in a row and he realised that besides everything else he had a good sense of humour. He was a go-getter not only for himself but he had pulled Gawaine along with him when all hope of his brother's going anywhere academically had seemed lost. His father spoke highly of him and he knew that his mother liked him.

He had to acknowledge that Merlin could be very attractive looking to anther man and could understand how Arthur had been drawn to him. Although he wasn't a betting man, he would be willing to wager that in years to come this young man and his friend might become involved. He cautioned, "Merlin, don't put your life on hold because of Arthur. What are you planning to do next year?"

"Hopefully get into Oxford, or rather that is what I intend to strive for."

"Good choice, nevertheless remember to keep your feet on the ground and live the present, look forward to the future and try not to regret the past. Arthur is one in a million and if in years to come you become involved I can see your being happy."

He grinned at Merlin who gave him a big smile. He turned to go out the door saying over his shoulder, "…and, Merlin, he'd be one lucky bastard." Laurence shook his head as he went downstairs saying to himself, "You'd better look out, Arthur, as I think you might have met your match!"

Merlin never told Gawaine exactly what Laurence had said, he'd just brushed it off by saying, "He told me to be careful, to study hard…and to keep pushing you to study as well!"

"He must have said more, that would have only taken fifteen seconds and it seemed like you were talking for a half hour. Did he say that you should go out with Arthur?"

"That's for me to know and you to find out," Merlin said laughing. He changed the subject by adding, "I'd love some ice-cream, is there any chance that you mother has some in the freezer?" He knew Gawaine wouldn't give up that easily on trying to find out what Laurence had told him but he really needed to absorb it himself before sharing any of it.

"Cleverly dodged! However, I'm not giving up that easily, I've always liked Arthur and think that he would be a super boyfriend for you!"

"Gawaine, think about it, I'm only seventeen and he is going to be twenty-one," he laughed as he added, "Surely, even you must see that that is almost cradle-snatching."

"Some baby…!" said Gawaine as he headed for the kitchen and hopefully ice-cream.

-0-0-

Merlin had trouble sleeping that night, he tossed and turned and by seven o'clock in the morning he was exhausted. At breakfast his mother thought he was coming down with something and sent him back to bed promising him a hot drink asking, "Were you on your computer all night?"

"No, I just couldn't sleep." He went upstairs is was dark and rainy outside. He was sick, he decided. He knew deep down what the ailment was...his heart was broken. Why did Arthur have to be an adult and he was still only a teenager? He allowed himself to dwell on the positive things which Laurence had said. Arthur liked him, that was a start and he fell asleep with a smile on his face.

When Hunith came up later he was fast asleep and she went back to the sitting room and drank the hot Ovaltine herself. Her son might have been asleep but she didn't realise how active his mind was.

-0-0-

 _He's younger and cuddles into Gaius as they are sitting on the sofa watching TV. It's stormy outside but he feels safe and protected. Gaius is the man in his life and has been for as long as he can remember. There's a blurry time when there is a younger man who gives him piggyback rides and makes his mother laugh. Then his mother becomes sad and Gaius looks after him. For the longest time he feels that this forgotten man is sitting by his bed at night watching over him; however he never tells his mother as he thinks it will make her cry._

 _He feels the years passing and now, there is another man in his life, a blond just a little older than him but for all intents and purposes millions of years ahead of him._

 _He's at Oxford and the man is nearly four years ahead of him and no matter how hard he studies, academically he can't catch up to him. He tells his tutors he wants to sit the following year exams but they just laugh at him. One day, he's standing on the Hertford Bridge and he puts his head against the cold stone and sighs deeply as life really wasn't fair._

 _Suddenly the man is standing beside him and he says, 'If you are going to sigh, this is the best place to do it as it is also called the Bridge of Sighs…'_

 _Merlin spins around and catches sight of him going around the corner, he runs after him calling, 'Arthur, wait for me I need to talk to you!'_

 _Laurence is standing there and tries to block his way saying, 'Don't chase him that's the worse thing you can do as it makes you look needy.'_

 _Now running beside him is Gawaine who grins and says, 'Ignore him, Merlin, if you really want him run after him as fast as you can!'_

 _His mother and Gaius stand on the corner and she says, 'Have you really thought this out, Merlin?' He blows her a kiss, gives her a grin and keeps running. The others all fall back but Arthur is too far ahead of him._

 _He's out of breath, disillusioned and tired he clings to the railings outside the Radcliffe Camera and sobs._

 _He hears a voice say, 'Merlin?' and turns Arthur is standing no more than four feet away._

' _I…I want to be with you!' he sobs and Arthur smiles. That is all Merlin needs and he throws himself at him. He nestles himself into Arthur's chest and sighs as Arthur wraps his arms around him. He remembers the cuddles of his childhood and he knows he will be safe. He clasps him to himself never wanting to let him go. For all he cares, they can grown old standing there…_

He awoke to the sound of a car horn and came to, hanging on for dear life to his pillow. Arthur was gone but the feelings persisted and he allowed himself a few more minutes of memories before he decided to get out of bed.

He wandered downstairs and his mother said, "Well, you look a little more rested! How about scrambled eggs and mushrooms for lunch?"

Merlin grabbed some juice from the fridge and said, "Actually, I think that I could eat a horse!"

-0-0-

The more Merlin looked at the photo of the three of them at Himalayan Thunder, the more he wanted to thank Arthur by sending him the photo. Problem was that he had no way of contacting him and then he realised that he did. He would have to depend upon Laurence. He got his email address from Gawaine after promising to show him the photo as well.

He thought seriously about what to write and then just wrote simply how he felt.

Laurence,  
Attached is the photo from our supper in London.  
If you have any reservations about forwarding it  
to Arthur, just delete it. I will understand,  
Merlin

His intention wavered a little before he actually hit the send key. He had no expectations one way or the other as Arthur was probably very busy with his studies and life in Bruxelles.

-0-0-

School was in full swing. He and Gawaine were serious about getting good marks and they immersed themselves in their classes, homework and projects.

"What are we doing this upcoming mid term break?" Merlin asked one day as they sat in his kitchen having finished their revisions for the week.

"Anything as long as it's not studying," Gawaine said yawning as he stretched his hands over his head.

"Mum agrees as she said that we should get out and about. Do something completely different!"

"But the weather isn't going to be nice this weekend." Gawaine had visions of tromping along beaches or walking streets dodging raindrops and being drenched by cars' driving through puddles. He had suddenly become interested in his appearance especially his hair which he was wearing longer but still within the school norms or so he hoped as he hadn't been stopped yet by any staff member.

"Your hair is not going to fall out because you walk in the rain and if you feel it might you can wear a shower cap or carry a brolly. Once we arrive at our destination we won't get wet, I promise!" Merlin insisted.

"Where is this place?"

"Couple of blocks from Metropolitan Cathedral, with luck we might even be able to hear our choristers practising for Advent. You access it from The Old Stable Yard on Smithdown Lane."

It had been Gaius who had suggested the Williamson tunnels. So Merlin had checked and the history of the area was interesting. He assured his mum that if they were open to the public, they must have passed safety checks.

At the beginning of the nineteenth century, a Joseph Williamson had purchased undeveloped land to build houses where there had previously been some sandstone quarrying. The prospective home owners wanted large gardens so Williamson built arches over the older quarrying regions to allow for terraces.

He must have enjoyed the work as he continued after all the houses were built excavating the area as tunnels. He employed many labourers but was secretive about his motives. Some people suggested it was to provide a safe haven for a secret religious society but Williamson was a practising Anglican and said that it enabled him to employ men who would have been jobless. He built up their self respect as valid contributors to the society of the time.

In the early twentieth century, soldiers from the West Lancashire Territorial Forces Association explored the tunnels under their mess hall and mapped the ones not filled with rubble. Even Lime Street Station ran through the area of the Williamson tunnels. A micro-gravity survey was done by a Liverpool University geology student in 1995. Since then further investigations and removal of rubble had been carried out.

A guided tour was offered through the tunnels which were lit by electricity. On display were artefacts from nineteenth century Liverpool which had been dropped down the various shafts on the surface. One tunnel they visited was massive, more like a cavern and was referred to as the Banqueting Hall, seventy feet long, twenty to twenty-five feet wide and twenty feet high as apposed to the regular tunnels with a width of four feet and height of six. They learned that this large cavern was often used for entertainment and had been used for concerts and even a rave.

Merlin whispered, "I think, I'll have my twenty-first birthday here!"

"And will Arthur be invited?" Gawaine asked with a grin.

"If he agreed to come that would be the best present."

"But he'd be an old man of twenty five, probably on sticks and these tunnels have limited disability access. He'd also be with his twenty-four hour carer." Gawaine insisted adding, "Someone like Mrs. Brown who might also move in with her Boys!"

Merlin started laughing, "Gawaine, that's an awful thing to say...but it is funny."

Merlin had noticed that Gawaine had in certain situations a way of flipping his hair. It invariably was in the presence of attractive females. The hair which was controlled during school hours had a mind of its own on the weekend. Merlin figured that hair control products or lack of them might be the cause.

They enjoyed the tour. Gawaine hoping to be allowed to go off on his own, had visions of finding an unexploded WW2 bomb. Merlin was thankful he hadn't had to convince him that it was not a good idea, as the tour guide was insistent that no one went wandering off.

As they finished the tour and left the entrance, the heavens opened up and Merlin swore to himself that he had heard Gawaine say, "My hair!"


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER TEN : RESEARCH AND REMEMBRANCE**

The importance of the final year set in the week following mid term as they settled back in the routine of school. Their teachers had on hand information from various universities and individual counselling had started to help pupils decide their two schools of choice. Merlin's choice was Oxford but he was encouraged to have a second choice in case his marks were not sufficient. Gawaine wanted Oxford as well but he knew his chances were not as good as Merlin's so he had to seriously consider a second choice. He opted for Liverpool University as his father had graduated from there with a law degree before going on to the London School of Economics.

Many of their course work now involved projects. Gawaine and he had a project for Religious studies. An outline had to be submitted and once accepted, they had to work on it in their own time and submit it in March. They would be expected to keep their teacher advised of their progress and he would be there to help if they reached a dead end.

Merlin and he came up with many ideas from the birds atop the Liver Building and the LFC crest being representative of the Eagle of St. John to various Bishops and Cardinals in the history of their city. Gawaine thought that the eagle idea was great but the more he went on about it, Merlin realised that it would lean more toward the LFC than anything else so he vetoed it.

They had decided to be original to catch their professors' attention so they finally settled upon something which no one else would probably cover one of the Forty Martyrs of England and Wales.

As Merlin loved history, they had decided to work on the history of one Cuthbert Mayne from Devon (1554-1577) an English Catholic priest put to death under the reign of Elizabeth the First.

Because the two of them were so involved, they spoke incessantly about Cuthbert and both their families became involved in the research. Gawaine found out that once the English seminaries were closed, the seminarians were trained on the continent and one seminary used was in Bruges. He mentioned this to Laurence who in turn mentioned it to Arthur.

Arthur offered his home in London to Gawaine and Merlin if they wanted to one weekend visit the National Archives Museum, some of whose manuscripts were available for viewing by appointment. They would be bothering no one as his father would be away.

Merlin was excited to go to London again and also to see Arthur. He had heard nothing from him so he didn't know if Laurence had even forwarded the photo he'd sent him.

Hunith had listened to Arthur's invitation but it was worrying that although there was a housekeeper and her husband to look after the boys, Arthur did not plan to be there. Hunith and Grace decided that it was an opportunity not to be missed but felt they would need an adult with them They would first approach Laurence to keep an eye on them for the weekend and if he couldn't get away then Gaius offered to go with them. Laurence agreed to be there and spoke directly to Arthur.

"With the two of them unsupervised in London, who knows if there would even be a city the next time I come home," Arthur joked.

"Have faith, Arthur, how much trouble can two boys of that age get into?" He then started to laugh as he remembered spending a week in London as a nineteen year old when Arthur's father was away and how Pierce had had to get them, out of a rather sticky situation with a prostitute.

Merlin was a bit disappointed to learn that Arthur would not be in London. Needless to say the excursion was a great success for as well as spending the Friday at the museum, Arthur had managed to get them tickets at the Globe for The Tempest and had made reservations at the Himalayan Thunder so that Gawaine and Laurence could also see the restaurant where he had taken Hunith and Merlin during the late summer. He had made arrangements that the bill for dinner be put on his account.

Laurence had stayed many times at Mulberry Square but Gawaine and Merlin were both astounded at not only the house but the fact that there was a locked park in the middle of the square which was a private garden for the square residents, accessible only with a key. It was also novel being driven everywhere by a uniformed chauffeur.

Laurence made sure that the boys saw the historical plaque sunken in the road for the site of the Tyburn Tree near Speakers Corner at Marble Arch where many of the Forty Martyrs had been hanged before being cut down while still alive and then drawn and quartered which was the statuary penalty for high treason. Merlin made sure that he had photos of it.

Midmorning on Sunday, Laurence saw the boys off at Euston before he returned to Oxford.

The next time Arthur was in London, the housekeeper told him that his visitors had been perfect guests and she had enjoyed having them in the house. She had enquired about Arthur's weekend in Paris. He had looked at her blankly for a couple of seconds before confessing that he hadn't been out of the country but staying at the family home in Wales.

He hoped secretly that Merlin was a little disappointed that he hadn't been there; however he felt that it was better to stay out of the way. He smiled as he went to his desk, opened a drawer and took out a copy of the photo which Laurence had mailed him suggesting that he should not acknowledge receipt of it.

-0-0-

Cuthbert Mayne had been a Catholic priest trained in France who had returned to England upon his ordination and was in hiding. Arrested in 1576, he was tried and found guilty of high treason. He was subsequently offered his life in return for renouncing his religion which he refused to do. He was hanged, drawn and quartered in Launceston, Cornwall. He was one of the group of Forty Martyrs canonised n 1970.

Hunith felt that the project was macabre but Gaius said that it was representative of the way the men and women of The Forty Martyrs, as well as many other Roman Catholics had been killed. Merlin and Gawaine's Cuthbert Mayne project would eventually be presented in school with the other projects and Gaius felt that it was a valid part of the boys' education.

Merlin was pushing Gawaine to continue with his work on the project as there was still much to do. They had all the information, now they just needed to pull it together to make it worthwhile not only for their teachers but also for the other students who would be studying it and comparing it to their own efforts. Hunith who was artistic agreed to help with the set up and proofed it until not even Gaius could find a mistake. The boys then breathed a sigh of relief.

The professors were impressed by the project as well as the research which had gone into it. Unbeknownst to Merlin and Gawaine, a letter had been received from an influential party making reference to antique books which held the accounts of the lives of the Forty Martyrs, which the gentleman wished to donate to the school library. St. Edward's College Committee gratefully accepted the kind offer.

-0-0-

Arthur's time in Bruxelles was over and he had yet to speak to his father about his so called gap year. He had made a final decision that he would return to Oxford and continue his studies in economics. Deep down, he would like to get a doctorate before taking a place in his father's business. He'd half-heartedly joked with Laurence over Christmas that he would like to be known as Dr. Arthur Pendragon.

Laurence agreed feeling that it had a nice ring to it and pleased that Arthur might be returning to Oxford as he could suggest that they share accommodation. "How did your Old Man take it?"

"Haven't told him yet as I want to get accepted before letting him know. Regardless, I intend to pursue my education and if he threatens to cut me off, I'll remind him that I have money from my mother's estate and I am certainly independent financially if nothing else."

Laurence knew that Uther would never cut Arthur out of his will as he was dependant on his continuing the family business. He laughed and added, "Let me know how things go and once you find out if you are accepted I'll start looking for a flat for us."

"I'd prefer a house or maybe a castle," Arthur added with a laugh. A little thought was floating in his mind that maybe it wouldn't only be Laurence who might be sharing his place.

However, first he has a few other things on his plate.

-0-0-

Laurence on his next free weekend met up with Arthur in London.

Arthur was looking forward to spending more time in the U.K. He was still working at securing a place at Oxford for the autumn term or earlier if possible. "I expect to hear back soon, I've had my first interview and they already have on file the records of my first year so it is now all up to them. There was some interest in my results from Bruxelles, but who knows. I'll let you know when I hear from them and we can seriously discuss housing for next year."

Laurence thought that the idea of having Arthur back in Oxford would be wonderful. He could imagine the fun they'd get up to. They wouldn't be in the same lectures but if Arthur was willing to work really hard and seriously apply himself to his studies they might graduate within a year of each other. Their plan had always been to set up together in London.

0-0-

In the meantime, Merlin and Gawaine were getting ready for their Christmas break. The school had a concert with Gawaine playing in one of the groups. He was a passable drummer and with his hair pulled forward so it hid his eyes, he was the hit of the evening. His father was unable to attend but his mother sat with Hunith and Gaius and they all insisted that they had enjoyed themselves. The evening finished with a carol presentation by the school's Cathedral Choristers, during which the audience of staff, students and Sixth Form parents were invited to join in certain selections.

The following day, Gawaine's group was one of those chosen to perform for the younger classes. Kieran and Garth were thrilled to be able to lay claim to their brother, whom they considered to be the star of the whole show.

A Mass at the Cathedral for students staff and family members finished the term after which the students were dismissed to return after the New Year. It was a sobering thought for the Upper Sixes that they only had two terms before leaving school.

The Knells were going to their country place for Christmas. Merlin's family were planning to stay home but then Hunith and he were invited to spend a few days with Gawaine's family after Christmas. Grace said that she would appreciate some female company when surrounded by so many males. Hunith agreed and off they went to Hexforth.

Laurence was expected to join them for a few days over Christmas itself after which he was going skiing in Switzerland with Arthur and his father who, not surprisingly had a chalet near Zermatt.

Merlin had hoped that Arthur might have visited the Knells over the holidays. He hadn't seen Arthur in the flesh since he had entertained him and his mum in London at the end of the summer. He'd stayed at his place in London while he was on the Continent. He had never heard anything about the photo so he supposed that Laurence had decided against forwarding it. He was a little disappointed as Arthur might have liked it.

He had been so busy at school that he hadn't had time to spend hours daydreaming about him but when he woke in the morning and knew that in his dreams Arthur had been present, it gave him hope.

He really wanted to see him again. He would like to spend hours with just the two of them talking and he then realized that if it ever became a possibility, he hoped that Arthur would not mention anything to Laurence who although he was a nice chap seemed to put a damper on anything to do with Arthur and himself.

In his mind, he already had a list which he would run through, of topics that he might like to discuss with him but there was one which he never actually verbalized and that was whether Arthur found him attractive enough to consider going out with. He sighed, 'Why is growing up so hard?' True, things came to him easily and he did well in his studies, he had a happy home life and he was healthy but there was something just outside the perimeters of his present life that was calling to him.

Then he would sigh and say to himself, 'You don't even know him! Maybe, he's a not really nice at all and the meeting in Scarborough and London had just been a way for him to amuse himself by teasing you.' But then he'd have flashbacks of the visits and decide that if Laurence had taken the trouble to speak to him, that he too must have been conscious of the attraction.

Merlin made his way with Gawaine down to breakfast, he was always surprised when the staff at Hexforth used Gawaine's parents actual titles, referring to them as Her Ladyship or His Lordship. The villagers addressed them as the Sir Michael and Lady Grace.

When they were alone, he'd asked Gawaine if Laurence as the eldest son would one day be known as Sir Laurence. Gawaine had explained that his father's title was for his lifetime and non-hereditary. "Therefore if Laurence wants a title he'll have to achieve it on his own merit. Anyway, my father really only uses his title in business."

They'd amused themselves by giving people they knew titles. Finally deciding that Kieran, Lord Knells sounded quite nice as did Hunith, Lady Emrys even Gawaine, Lord Knells was acceptable however, Merlin Lord Emrys sounded sissy. "But I would have liked to be called His Lordship," Merlin had insisted.

Another possibility was Sir Arthur, Lord Mulberry. Both boys had laughed and decided that Arthur suited a more important name and settled on King Arthur Pendragon.

For the longest time, whenever Merlin dreamed of Arthur it was in his capacity as a royal. He was cast as his faithful companion and advisor, often with more emphasis on companion than advisor.


	11. Chapter 11

**CHAPTER 11 : FACING THE LAST TERM**

The New Year brought snow and ice. Many cars were unable to get on the roads in the North and heavy sleet and rain brought many of the southern area to a standstill. Nonetheless school continued with pupils missing early morning classes due to late buses and trains. It had taken Gawaine an hour to get home, he phoned Merlin and sounded fed up saying, "If I ever suggest going for a holiday somewhere where there is snow, please remind me how miserable I felt today!"

Merlin laughed saying that he'd get over it, "…and anyway your brother hadn't complained about the snow when he was away, if anything he was thrilled with it!" Thoughts of Arthur floated through his brain making it difficult to concentrate.

"Well," Gawaine said, "Wait until his train back to Oxford is delayed and then we'll see how he feels. I think if I can convince my mother that it is really awful she might allow me to stay home tomorrow."

"You are just back from three weeks off. Be a man, Gawaine, do it for your Queen and country!"

Merlin laughed as Gawaine said, "Shut up, Merlin!" then added almost immediately, "I heard a juicy bit of gossip today. How much is it worth to you if I tell you?"

"I'd maybe go as far as a Crunchier Bar!"

"Two Crunchies and a meal at your place!"

"My mother won't be interested in your gossip about some girl...and as a matter of fact I won't be either!"

"You'll regret it, and don't say I didn't warn you." Gawaine laughed as he knew that if he got at least two Crunchies, they could have one each.

He waited and finally Merlin said, "OK! Supper at my place and one Crunchie."

"I'll tell you tomorrow when I see you at school."

"I thought that you were taking the day off!"

"Changed my mind...anyway, I want to see your face when I tell you. Have to go for supper but might call you later if I don't get any better offers!" Gawaine grinned to himself, he'd heard his parents talking about Arthur being accepted at Oxford and Laurence and he planning to look for somewhere to rent.

-0-0-

Merlin's jaw dropped when Gawaine told him the following day that Arthur was at Oxford, having managed to secure a place for a couple of courses over the summer and hoping to pick up his degree course full time in September.

"Oh that's really nice, Dear, for his father to have him back in England full time," his mum had said hearing the news at supper.

"Well, Gawaine mentioned that Laurence and he are intended to rent something together for next year."

His mother had a worried look as she said, "Won't that be rather expensive?"

"I'm sure that Arthur has enough money." His mother looked at him, so he added, "The Pendragon's are very rich, I would say probably multi millionaires."

"Well, now that I think about it with their different homes, I suppose they must be and Arthur is such a nice young man,"

Merlin had almost choked as he wondered how nice his mother would think he was if she had been privy to some of her son's thoughts.

"So, now it's up to you to get the marks to guarantee that you will get into Oxford. I'll feel a lot safer letting you go knowing that Laurence and Arthur are there. However, you probably won't bump into them as there are so many other students."

Merlin nodded in agreement, knowing that where there was a will there was always a way…and he had the will. By then he would be eighteen, on the verge of being a man of the world.

He lay in bed and imagining the scenario, Arthur might invite him out to dinner with Laurence and then maybe another time it would just be the two of them. He realised that he was inexperienced in matters of the heart but hopefully Arthur wouldn't consider that as a shortcoming.

He fell asleep and dreamt of shabby flats with no food on the table, no heating and the only way to keep warm was for people to double up in bed; of uni courses which were way beyond his ability and missing his Mum, Gaius and Liverpool.

-0-0-

The end of March was approaching and thankfully Easter Holidays lay ahead. Then there would be the final plush to those all important exams which loomed ahead. Small groups were even planning to extend the school days so they could sit with tutors discussing the weaker points in their studies.

Hunith insisted that all work and no play was stifling therefore she gave Merlin two day-trip tickets to Cardiff over the Easter holidays. She had fond memories of the town as it had been at Cardiff University that she had met Merlin's father before he went on to Oxford. Naturally, Gawaine got permission to accompany him. As the trip would take three hours, they decided to leave Lime Street on the earliest train arriving in Cardiff around ten o'clock, planned to have a busy day before leaving Cardiff at after seven o'clock for the return which would get them back in Liverpool around ten in the evening.

Gawaine said that he was willing to get up that early but just in case, they stayed overnight at Merlin's. Hunith sent them off on their own, worrying until she saw their faces that evening at the station, that an adult should have accompanied them.

Gaius laughed as he said, "Hunith, they're old enough. Between the two of them they have sufficient brains to figure everything out."

-0-0-

Cardiff Castle was first on their list and Merlin was in his element as he had his camera with him. Everything pleased him even the city's logo of a mounted knight. Passing through the exterior walls, Merlin was happy to see arrow slots and an upper gallery. They visited the remnants of a Roman wall and Merlin took great photos of the old Norman castle built on the site of a Roman Fort.

The interior of the Victorian gothic castle was spectacular and Merlin's reaction to it, caused Gawaine to say, "Give over, Merlin, it's a rich man's fantasy. You could have done the same if you had the money."

"I doubt that! As the architect must have been brilliant and the artisans well qualified as the work which has gone into this is unbelievable; look at the staircases and murals painted on plastered walls, the gilded wood carvings and that stained glass window of the dragon. I could live here for years and never tire of it."

Gawaine just raised his eyes to heaven. Certainly the place was beautiful but he felt it was over the top almost stifling. The one thing that really impressed him were the carved ceilings, beautifully lit and geometrically interesting to his eye. Maybe Merlin was right, there were some rooms in which he would happily have lain on the floor to get the full affect, especially in the Arab room

They then took a lunch break and sat in the sun on the wall facing the Norman tower and had the sandwiches which Gawaine's mother had made. Gawaine said that he could see himself in a long cloak, helmut and sword, guarding the place."

"…and running up and down those steep stairs all day, to reach the tower?" Merlin pointed out.

"Well,"Gawaine conceded,"Maybe not every day…" Merlin just smiled and shook his head.

Merlin then wanted to visit the renowned Animal Wall to the west of the castle. At many places, he had to wait until he could get the shots he wanted as so many people wanted to take photos of the animals. Merlin had seen photos of the carved animals but he loved them better in their original settings. There were fifteen including the two lions with heraldic shields.

They returned to the castle for the falconry display and Merlin's heart was won by a barn owl. He smiled when the falconer explained that in the Spring they couldn't fly and train their castle peregrines except on lines as there were a pair of peregrines nesting on the clock tower of the City Hall and they didn't want the castle birds interfering with the nesting pair or their nestlings.

They reluctantly said goodbye to the castle and Bhute Park and got on the City Tour Bus outside the front door to see other attractions in Cardiff. Gawaine in looking at a brochure for other tours noticed a guided Dr. Who Tour. "You'd have liked that!" he'd told Merlin.

Merlin had frowned and said, "Who Who?" and flapped his arms. If they hadn't been on the bus, Gawaine would have decked him one.

Understandably the Millennium Stadium was Gawaine's favourite while Merlin liked the Millennium Centre for the Arts and Mermaid Quay. The bus tour was excellent and it gave them an overview of the area which would have been difficult to accomplish on foot in the time they had left.

Not wanting to be racing to get the train and feeling hungry, they stopped off at Wagamama's which they had passed on the way to the castle that morning. Gawaine insisted on picking up the tab, then confessed with a smile, "Courtesy of my mother!"

Hunith was relieved to see both of them get off the train in one piece. Gaius drove them back home as Gawaine was staying over but had promised to phone his mother once he was back in Liverpool.

-0-0-

Easter holidays over, the end was in sight but first there was still one more term and those dreaded exams. It was a particularly stressful time, not only for the students who weren't well prepared but also those who had applied themselves to the best of their ability and wanted to get good marks.

Merlin and Gawaine fell into the second group. They had worked hard and seriously during their last two years in Sixth Form. Now, in a few months they would find out it had been sufficient.

The exams were gruelling even though they knew that if they didn't achieve the marks they wanted it was possible to rewrite them next year. For Merlin, that was not a consideration as he was determined to get into university and not spend another year at school.

There was a four day break at the end of May but he had plans to sit in his room and revise for his exams, he remembered how Gawaine and he had always tried to find something different to visit but for once, both of them would stay put.

Hunith was worried that he was pushing himself too hard as he had turned from being a bubbly personality to someone quite withdrawn: however Gaius assured her that he was healthy and it was a normal phase that most good students went through. "Do you think his marks will be good enough for Oxford?" she said, "He's worked so hard and he will be disappointed."

Gaius smiled, "I can remember when he first decided that he would go to university. I had thought he might have followed me into Cambridge but not so. I think it had something to do with Ron having studied there."

Smiling softly, Hunith said, "His father would have been so proud to think that his son would be studying there."

Gaius had lauded adding, "Well, beside worrying, I think a couple of prayers might not go amiss."

-0-0

The day arrived when the final exam was written. Merlin was in another world, what he had worked so hard for was finished. His exams were in the hands of the Board of Education Certified examiners. He had done all he could and now he must await his fate and hope that by mid-August he'd have his marks in hand. His university applications were in and he had had a preliminary interview by phone, now he must wait like thousands of other students country wide. Deep down he knew that he only wanted to get into his first choice university. He dreaded the letter which would arrive mid August with his marks.

Gawaine had laughed at him saying that he was looking forward to that day. He'd done his best and if none of the universities he had applied to wanted him, he might just take a gap year and sail to a deserted island where he would commune with the hermit…" he'd made Merlin laugh as he had added, "…crabs!"

"Oh, I forgot to tell you Laurence is back home and he asked Mum if next week Arthur could join them as he had a few days term break. My father is away that week and Mum says she's rather stay here and wait for him to return before packing everyone off to Hexforth for the holidays. So, we'll be having a house guest and I was half wondering if you might like to join us for supper at least once?"

But he would be there longer than one meal as Hunith's friend Getrude had had a knee replacement and Hunith had offered to go down to London to stay for a few days. Gawaine's mother had insisted that Merlin might as well stay with them while she was away knowing that Hunith wasn't too fussy on leaving him alone as Gaius was on his way to Aberdeen to visit friends from his university days.

"But you'll have a house full," Hunith had stated.

"Don't worry," Grace said, "You and I will go out one day as I will deserve to have a girls' day out after dealing with this bunch."

Hunith had laughed, "Sounds wonderful! We'll pamper ourselves, lunch out, some shopping and maybe get out nails done."

Gawaine when he heard the news that Merlin was staying as well, was thrilled, "It'll be great, you can talk to Arthur and Laurence about Oxford and I can watch how the impending relationship between you and Arthur is progressing."

"I can assure you that there is not a relationship. I hardly know him and anyway, he might have another friend by now."

"Scared to say boyfriend, are we? Go ahead, make all sorts of excuses but if I read it right, Arthur is still interested in you. He let us stay at his place and treated us royally with the theatre and meals. Yes, I wager, that there is romance in the stars. Don't worry, I'll check with Laurence to see if the coast is clear…"

"Don't you dare!" Merlin said getting all hot under the collar. Gawaine was a good friend and he would always want him in his corner but not in this situation. He would rather face the future with a clear mind not worrying about what Gawaine was likely say or do to make sure that they had private time together.

He just wanted to meet Arthur again and let things happen by themselves. His heart was pleading with him that he should make sure that Arthur knew that he would be receptive to any attention from him but his mind told him to act himself. If Arthur really did like him, the ball was in his court. He was not going to jeopardise any future situation by coming on strong.

He lay in his bed that night and stared at the shadows cast by the street light. He tried to make sense of the whole situation but his mind was still racing with having finished school and he fell asleep before he solved anything to his satisfaction. He tossed and turned all night and spent most of his time dreaming of opening door after door as someone had rung the bell but there was never any one on the other side.


	12. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER 12 : FREE AT LAST**

Merlin took his stuff over to Gawaine's who said, "You know, I should have told my mum that I was going to stay with you. We could have had a great time alone. Couldn't we?"

"Too late, as it's all arranged and I'm here," Merlin answered.

The twins wanted to go to the park to kick a football around, so their father said that Gawaine had to go with them. Merlin didn't mind going with them but Gawaine was annoyed. "I'm not a babysitter," he told them.

"Well, we're not babies!" Kieran stated.

Garth stood beside him with his hands on his hips, and said, "I bet you didn't like Laurence watching you either when all you wanted to do was play."

"Mum just likes to be careful," Kieran said, "you come with us and then you can go off and Gawaine can talk to girls. Then come back and we'll all go home together."

Merlin enjoyed listening to the twins gang up on Gawaine. He wondered what it was like to have a little bother, well actually two in Gawaine's case.

In the end, they followed the boys and left them playing while they went over to sit on a park bench nearby. Gawaine wouldn't leave the park as he said that his life would be worth nil if he came home without them. Then he decided he was starving and Merlin offered to get some chips. He walked out of the park, crossing the street to Prue's Fish 'N Chips and got two small chips. Then he remembered that they were not alone and got two more orders for the others. Prue herself put them into the bags, he paid, thanked her and walked back to the park. He had to wait while a couple of cars went by and he never noticed one of the passengers suddenly smiling as he noticed him.

The oak bench was empty and he could see the three Knells boys kicking the ball around in the distance. He put his fingers in his mouth and whistled. Gawaine looked up and dribbled the ball back to the bench with the twins trying to intercept it.

They were thrilled to get chips. Garth said as he sat down next to Merlin, "We should go to the park with you more often!"

Gawaine laughed as he said, "You're welcome!"

"Not you, Gawaine, Merlin as he bought us chips," Kieran said and the twins laughed as they thought it was so funny.

When they returned to the house, Lawrence's car was in the drive and the twins went off to find him. Gawaine said off hand, "So, Mum, did he bring Arthur with him?" Digging Merlin in the side, he grinned as his mother nodded and asked them if the twins had behaved himself.

Merlin said, "They were as good as gold. We'd be willing to chaperone them any day."

Gawaine's mother saw the shocked look on her son's face as he scowled at Merlin, and she laughed as she said, "Well, thank you so much, Merlin, I'll have to see if I can find another opportunity for you to look after them."

-0-0-

"That was Merlin, wasn't it?" Arthur had said.

"Yes, would think he's on his way to meet someone in the park."

Arthur mulled over what he had said. Had Merlin found a boyfriend since he'd seen him in London with Hunith? Why had he thought that he'd be waiting for him when he had never declared his feelings? If the truth were known, he had spoken more about him with Laurence than he had actually spoken to Merlin.

Laurence decided to put him out of his misery, "Gawaine is probably around somewhere," he pointed to the same direction in which Merlin was walking and added, "as over there, the kids usually play football. My parents don't let them go alone but if Gawaine is around they go off with him."

Arthur felt a load being taken off his shoulders. He had to approach Merlin and have a talk with him. He wanted him to know that he liked him and then give him time to make up his mind if he felt the same way. In his luggage, he had the photo from Himalayan Thunder.

He regretted now that he hadn't followed his heart and acknowledged Merlin's photo over Laurence's reservations. It would have given him an opportunity to contact him and maybe even have kept in touch. He just hoped that Merlin felt the same way about him.

They pulled into the driveway and dropped off in the kitchen so that Laurence could tell his parents that he was back. Laurence's father stood up and walked to the pantry returning with three bottles of ale. "Thirsty?" he said and the two of them followed him into his den.

Mrs Knells smiled thinking, 'It was good having all the family together, as well as Merlin whom she now considered part of her extended family. She liked Arthur and was quite happy to have him around too. She sometimes felt that he was a lost soul and she was determined for him to feel accepted and a valued guest when he was in her home.'

-0-0-

Mr. Knells had asked after Uther who was in New York for a month. He didn't bother saying that the people he was dealing with at work were more relaxed once the boss was out of the country. He felt that Arthur had all the get-up-and-go which his father had but that he certainly had a kinder way in dealing with people.

The three of them talked about Oxford and Arthur mentioned his plans to find proper accommodation, explaining that at the moment he was living in a rented flat which was all right but that he would like something better as he still had three years to do.

"I've asked Laurence to join me, in my new place, We get on well and I intend it to be big enough that we won't be on top of each other."

Laurence said, "We saw a rather nice place belonging to a professor who was going to South Africa this year but that means that when he returns we'd be looking for a new place. We want it to be close to public transport and it must have garage space for the cars." He laughed as he looked at Arthur before saying to his father, "Arthur, now feels that he should upgrade his and he would like to use the Jag which his father gave him for completing his courses in Bruxelles."

"I refuse to park it on the street so the search is for a two to three bedroomed house maybe, with a garage. I'd be willing to purchase it if it suits me."

Gawaine's father said, "Well investing in real estate is never a waste, especially in a university town. Visiting professors are always looking for a place especially those on short term such as the summer courses. What does your father think?"

Arthur grinned as he said, "Actually, I would like to surprise him when it's a fait accompli as I know he'd want to be involved and expect me to take his advice to heart. I'd rather like to make up my own mind."

The other two nodded and Laurence thought that it must be wonderful not having any financial restrictions on what you might purchase.

-0-0-

Gawaine's mother asked her son and Merlin if they wanted to eat later with the adults or eat early and then have a long evening. Merlin said that he'd like to eat early if Gawaine agreed, which he did.

"All right, I'll be setting up our meal in the dining room as it is a celebration that Laurence has completed another year towards his degree."

Gawaine argued that Arthur should only eat half a meal as he had only picked up some courses but his mother had said, "Don't be smart, you know what I meant. Give me a half hour and then you can come in and take your food into the conservatory and don't make a mess in there."

As soon as they had left the room, Gawaine looked at Merlin and said, "What was that about? Don't you want to dee Arthur?"

"Yes, of course but not under the scrutiny of your parents, I'd have felt very uncomfortable."

"Well I only hope that he understands your reasoning and doesn't think that you want nothing to do with him!"

Supper was fine in the conservatory, they sat at a little table and had fun as there were no parents to frown at them as they did silly things. Kieran lined up all his peas and then only ate every second one explaining that if they had been poisoned, he would only get a half dose and get sick not die. Garth decided that his peas would be better used a fertiliser and before Gawaine could stop him he was feeding them to all the plants that were close to the table.

Their mother came in once to ask if the twins were behaving themselves and they smiled sweetly and said, "Of course we are, aren't we?" looking at their brother and Merlin who just nodded trying not to laugh.

They took their empty plates and went back into the kitchen, where Gawaine loaded them into the dishwasher. There were a few escaped peas on the floor in the conservatory so he sent Kieran to clear them up. They made sure that everything was neat before going downstairs to watch a movie on the big screen in the family room.

Knowing that the younger ones would be going to bed earlier, they let them choose something to their liking and once their father called to say that it was time to go to bed, they turned it off and sat talking, each one spread out on the large sofas in the room.

"I've been thinking, you really have to say something to Arthur."

"I'd be too embarrassed, what if I vowed my undying love and he turned and laughed saying, 'You've got to be kidding!' I'd die on the spot and my while life would be ruined."

"Possibly," said Gawaine with a grin, "as you would be dead anyway."

"You know what I mean…"

"What happens if Arthur feels the same way and he's worried that you will go into shrills of laughter if he says that he finds you attractive?"

Merlin shrugged he'd never realised that growing up was going to be so difficult, "Then tell me, what do you say to a girl who you want to go out with?"

Thinking for a minute, Gawaine shrugged before he said, "Want to go out with someone on the football team?"

Merlin laughed and said, "…and if she doesn't immediately say, 'Yes, Lance!' You figure that you have a date." The two of them laughed.

Suddenly, the door opened and Laurence said, "So this is where you have been hiding yourselves. We wondered what the two of you had got up to." Arthur followed him into the room.

Gawaine said, "We sort of half watched a movie with the others and then they went to bed and we stayed here talking, why?"

"I've missing my little brother as I haven't seen him since I came back. I was expecting him to congratulate me on getting closer to my degree."

Arthur laughed, "He needs your seal of approval! Anything worth watching on TV?"

Gawaine said, "For someone who says that he's the man about town in Oxford, surprisingly he still needs his little brother's support."

Laurence swung at him and missed, "Well, don't hog the sofa move over!" His bother said as he plonked himself down beside him.

"As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted," Gawaine continued, "There's some international football in ten minutes. Dortmund versus Milan. It's a replay but Merlin and I haven't seen it yet."

Merlin immediately put his legs on the floor as Arthur sat down beside him. He knew that his heart was racing and he just hoped that it wasn't visible through his shirt. He was feeling all hot and bothered and hoped that he didn't make a fool of himself.

Arthur glanced at him and smiled and Merlin hoping that he wasn't blushing, tentatively smiled back.

-0-0-

Merlin became more relaxed as the game proceeded. Laurence and Gawaine bickered all the way through it and Arthur egged them on as Merlin grinned thoroughly enjoying himself. Dortmund won and they turned down the sound and continued talking.

Arthur was easy to listen to as he and Laurence recounted some of the high times over their years together. Arthur laughed as he turned to Gawaine, "So tell me, what have you and Merlin got up to that will beat our stories?"

Gawaine looked at him blankly shrugging his shoulders. Merlin thought of everything they had done in the past two years, realising that they certainly couldn't compete with some of the antics Laurence and Arthur had got up to.

Arthur put his arm across the back of the sofa saying, "As Gawaine, obviously isn't able to come up with anything, Merlin, I'm depending on you."

Quickly, Merlin racked his brains, then he grinned and recounted the story of meeting Antony Gormley and his dog on Crosby Beach. "We chatted and he even sent me two free admission passes to his next show. It was quite funny as Gawaine had spent all the day wandering around his statues and he still didn't recognise him."

Laurence punched Gawaine in the arm as he said, "Obviously, my little brothers's eyes didn't rise above their waists!"

Gawaine tried to tell him that that was not true but he had no chance as Arthur, Laurence and Merlin were laughing so hard.

Laurence went to the cupboard where his father kept his liquor and came back with a bottle of whiskey and four glasses. Gawaine perked up immediately.

"Just among the four of us...you two might as well start seriously drinking at home before going off to uni!"

"You'll have to replace the bottle as Dad knows exactly how much he has in each bottle."

"Not to worry as we have until Tuesday. Now, bottoms up!" Laurence said winking at Arthur which Merlin missed as he was staring in horror at the golden liquor in the glass he now held.

He hated the taste of whiskey. He was so worried that Arthur might consider him a child if he refused the drink that he steeled himself and swallowed the contents of the glass in one shot. It took his breath away and the burning in his throat was dreadful however he braced himself and refrained from choking.

Arthur was watching him and he could tell immediately that he didn't drink and felt awful. He could so easily have quietly told him to put his glass on the table and joke that he would willingly drink it later, so it wouldn't have been wasted.

Merlin knew what the outcome of that very generous shot would be; he would soon be fighting to keep his eyes open as alcohol put him asleep. Gaius had told him that his father hadn't been a fan of drinking either as it had the same effect on him.

Gawaine on the other hand could hold his drink and he kept pace with Laurence and Arthur.

Arthur could drink or refuse it as most of his drinking was social. He would have one drink at a party and nurse it all night. He glanced at Merlin whose head kept dropping to his chest.

Gawaine suddenly noticed and said, "Thump him and he'll wake up!" Laurence laughed and Arthur looking at Merlin peacefully dozing beside him, knew deep down that couldn't bring himself to hurt him.


	13. Chapter 13

**CHAPTER 13 : A GLIMPSE OF WHAT IS TO COME**

Arthur looked at Merlin slouched where he had about twenty minutes ago been sitting alert and following the conversation. His heart went out to him and before he could stop himself, he'd stood up and rearranged Merlin's legs onto the sofa and put a pillow behind his head, still leaving enough space for him to sit down as well.

Laurence and Gawaine were arguing about the merits of single malt. Arthur leant over and brushed the hair off Merlin's forehead and in so doing let his fingers graze the side of his cheek. He had never had such an electrifying reaction to touching any other person in his life.

Laurence smirked at Arthur and said, "Lucky you, Arthur!"

Gawaine must have glanced over as he said, "He's fast asleep isn't he? I think at the dentist they could just give him a whiff of the stuff and do the extraction before he woke up. Luckily, he's not a noisy drunk, just a little sleepy and he will have to be helped upstairs."

It was way after midnight and Gawaine knowing for sure that his parents had retired for the night, said, "If we use the back stairs, we won't have to pass their door." He stood up and turned to Laurence, "Come on give me a hand!"

Laurence shook his head, "Arthur will help you!"

Gawaine glanced at Arthur and as he could see that Arthur was uncomfortable, said "Laurence, you really should do it..."

"He's drunk because of Arthur...he was probably trying to impress him," his brother said quietly to him.

"Well, that backfired!" Gawaine commented.

While the others still argued, Arthur stood up and put Merlin's feet on the floor. He leant over him and said, "Merlin, it's time to go to bed!"

Merlin groggily opened his eyes and focused on Arthur's face before mumbling, "I won't know what to do, Arthur..." and fell asleep again.

Arthur's heart jumped, as he realised immediately what Merlin meant. He hoped that the others were still arguing sufficiently that they were not paying any attention as he was sure that he had blushed and hoped that a smile wasn't on his face. Merlin knew he liked him and he felt the same way. He murmured back, "Nothing to worry about, Love, as I'll be there."

Laurence came to his senses and stood up, he walked over to Merlin, shook him and said, "Come on, we've got to get you upstairs so you can sleep it off? Arthur, give me a hand, Gawaine you wash those glasses and put them away, wipe down the table and bring the bottle with you."

With Merlin slung between them like a sack of potatoes, they moved out of the room and into the hallway. He wasn't heavy and they easily manoeuvred him up the back stairs.

Arthur loved feeling him next to him as they climbed the stairs. Merlin's head was resting on his shoulder and he was tempted to turn around and touch his hair...but he didn't.

"We'll just dump him on his bed, wait for Gawaine, get the bottle and finish it in our room. I'm sorry about this, I didn't realise that he was such a lightweight and I think my shots were closer to doubles than singles. Never thought that he'd down it in one go."

"It's all right," Arthur said, "as Gawaine said, 'He was no trouble as he just fell asleep.' "

Arthur helped Laurence get him across the room and they put him on the bed, he couldn't help but think that a sleeping Merlin was more beguiling than when he was awake; however he remembered his smile and changed his mind.

Laurence grabbed his shoes and pulled them off. Arthur felt guilty as he was thinking about more than his shoes. Gawaine came in and said, "Bravo, you got him here safely! Here you go, one Merlin in exchange for less than a half bottle of hootch. Thanks…"

-0-0-

They walked to Laurence's room and sat drinking. "Shame to waste it!" Laurence said laughing. Laurence's room was large, two good sized beds, a couple of armchairs, a table, desk and an en-suite. He'd explained when Arthur had stayed over that first time, that there were two good-sized masters and that this one on the back of the house was his while his parents were on the side facing the park.

The Victorian house had been renovated after his parents had bought it and some of the smaller bedrooms had been made into modern en-suites and walk in wardrobes. As little as possible of the original features of the wood work and plaster moulding had been touched. The kitchen had however been completely updated and conservatory had been added facing the park.

Arthur liked Laurence's room He felt at home in it as he must have spend hundreds of nights there. He felt however that he might not be sleeping as soundly this time as he had previously, as his mind kept drifting to another room in the house. He couldn't get Merlin out of his mind. He was charming, intelligent and entertaining and to his mind beautiful. He smiled as he added, …unable to hold his liquor…and then he fell asleep to dreams filled with someone leaning against him, depending on him and loving him.

-0-0-

Merlin woke up quite early, he knew that Gawaine would have a harder time getting out of bed, so he got up, showered and went down to see if Mrs. Rolf had arrived and if there was any breakfast available. He knew that he was missing something from yesterday but he couldn't remember it so he just shrugged and kept going.

Mrs Knells was at the kitchen table with the twins who had finished breakfast and were waiting for something exciting to happen as it was after all the summer holidays. Gawaine's mother suggested that they should take the dogs out for a walk and Merlin after grabbing an apple and a piece of toast said that he would go with them so they could go as far as the lake.

Ready to go for a walk, Rambler and Brig were dancing around when they saw Garth get their leashes.

The twins wanted to know if Merlin remembered when the lake in Sefton Park had been drained for repairs and all the fish had gone to other parks across England. He had not as he wasn't living in Liverpool at the time so the boys gave him a very detailed account including all the species of fish that had been found in the lake.

"You know there are even turtles there now," Kieran told him.

It was closer to eleven when they finally returned and as he walked into the kitchen, the others were also trooping in. He saw Arthur and suddenly remembered last night in the family room and how he had fallen asleep on the sofa next to Arthur. Arthur looked directly at him and smiled but Merlin was too embarrassed to return the smile and he ducked his head which Arthur found endearing and Laurence found funny.

Mrs. Rolf offered to make them brunch and she also told Merlin that he should eat as an apple and a piece of toast wasn't a proper breakfast.

The twins were still around and they told Gawaine that Merlin had already taken them to the lake with the dogs, "…and you could have come too if you weren't so lazy," Garth added.

Arthur grinned it was so different here than at home. There was seldom a moment's peace and he never felt lonely. Laurence told the boys to get lost which they did without any arguing.

-0-0-

Merlin's mother came back from London so he went home and half way through the following week he received a letter from Oxford asking him to come for an interview. He panicked they'd obviously found something not to their liking in his admission form or first interview. He kept reading and saw that it had something to do with accelerated courses so he felt relieved. He passed the letter to his mother and watched the disappointment on her face turn to relief when she read the last paragraph.

The interview was for Wednesday the following week at four o'clock in the afternoon. He phoned the number given and said that he would be able to make it.

When he told Gawaine he said that they should contact Arthur, as maybe he would let him stay over with him. "If he does, I'll come as well and we can fool around on the Thursday and get a late afternoon train home. It can't cost that much and Arthur can't have courses all day so he will be able to take us out for a meal and show us around. I think it's a great plan."

For the first time in two years, Merlin had a feeling that he didn't want Gawaine around. His idea sounded really good but three would be a crowd and he would have liked to have had Arthur to himself. Deciding that that would be mean, he nodded and agreed that it would be fun.

Laurence agreed to try to reach Arthur and when he did, he handed the phone to Merlin and said, "You want to ask him a favour so you can talk to him." He had then grabbed Gawaine and hauled him out of the room.

Merlin's heart was racing as he took the phone and heard Arthur say, "Well, long time no speak, thought that maybe you had forgotten me."

"No, I wouldn't ever do that…"

"So, what is it that you need? Laurence said something about your needing something." Arthur was thrilled to hear Merlin's voice and the chance for him to help him in some way filled him with happiness.

Merlin became tongue tied but finally explained about the interview and Gawaine's plan and weakly finished by saying that he hoped that Arthur might be able to put them up.

Arthur had laughed as he said, "You certainly but I don't know if I can find somewhere for Gawaine."

Disappointed, Merlin said, "That's all right then. We'll take the last train back to Liverpool on Wednesday. Sorry to have bothered you."

Arthur said, "Merlin, wait! I was only kidding, my place is not great but there is room for both of you. I have a morning course on Wednesday and then I'm free till late Thursday afternoon." There was a pause before he said, "I would really like to see you. As funny as it sounds I was sorry when my little holiday with the Knells was over mainly because of you. However, two things first, has your mother given you permission to stay at my place and is there anything you particularly like for breakfast?"

"I know that she and Gaius discussed it and she then told me that she felt that it was all right as long as Gawaine was with me." Merlin paused before adding, "I think she's a little worried that you will whisk me off my feet."

"More importantly, does that worry you?" Arthur asked suddenly less light-heartedly.

He waited until Merlin said, "No, that doesn't worry me. I just worry that you think that I'm still a kid and for you this whole thing is just a joke."

Arthur said, "Merlin I don't see you as a kid and certainly not a joke. You are an outstanding young man and I would happily introduce you to all my friends and quite forcibly intercept any unwanted advancements they made towards you."

They chatted on as naturally as if the two of them were sitting together. Finally, Merlin heard the clock in the room strike the hour and he glanced at the phone to see that he had been on it with Arthur for three-quarters of an hour.

"I've got to go as Laurence will be wanting his phone back."

"Would you mind giving me your phone number so I can contact you directly? That is…if you want to."

Without hesitation he gave Arthur his number, it just seemed right that they should be able to talk to each other whenever they so wished. Hen then jotted down Arthur's number on a piece of paper and put it into his pocket.

"Phone me and tell me when your train arrives and I'll meet you at the station. Goodbye!"

"Thanks, Arthur, it was lovely talking to you…" and Merlin hung up. He felt that he was wrapped in a cosy duvet and had not a trouble in the world.

He must have been glowing as when Laurence walked in he asked, "…so, when's the wedding?"

Merlin blushed and Laurence thought to himself, 'If I liked boys, Merlin, you would be on my list!' and he was happy that Arthur and he seemed to be hitting it off.

-0-0-

The interview was excellent and Merlin was eligible for an accelerated course which had a limited number of pupils. The interviewer had congratulated him on his placement and hoped that he would have many years of success at the university.

Both Arthur and Gawaine were proud of his accomplishments and Arthur gave him a congratulatory hug as Gawaine said, "Guess who scored the match winning goal?"

They enjoyed their time with Arthur, his flat was small but as he had explained, at the end of his summer session he intended to start looking for a proper place of his own to share with Laurence. He bit his tongue to stop himself from blabbing out '…and maybe you too, Merlin, one day!'

As he saw them off, he gave Gawaine a manly hug. Gawaine's phone rang and as he was checking it, Arthur turned to Merlin and hugged him to him, whispering, "I'm missing you already and you haven't even got on the train." He touched his lips with his finger and said, "Say nothing!" and gave him a peck on the cheek and let go of him.

Gawaine turned saying that it had been Laurence, "There's a letter from Oxford that arrived in the morning post." He looked sick at the thought of having to wait three hours to open it but he really didn't want to know that he had not been accepted as that would have spoilt the trip home.

He looked at Merlin and Arthur standing there and he realised that Merlin really didn't need him at Oxford in September, as he was well able to manage on his own and more importantly he had Arthur to look after him.

 **THE END**


End file.
